3yo son refuses all food and drink at nursery! Please help!

[KirstyP0594]

Hi all,

I’m wondering if someone has some advice as I feel like I am exhausting all options. My son has always been a very picky eater, we suspect he has autism and has had all the necessary referrals made for him by the health visitor which he is on the waiting list for. But for some reason my son refuses all food and drink that the nursery serve to him. When he is home with me before nursery and after nursery he eats and drinks fine. Just wondered has anyone else experienced this? This has been going on since he started in mid August last year. The nursery have already made a special allowance for him to have a snack box provided by myself and flavoured water but he is even now refusing this. If anyone could help I would be so grateful as I really don’t know what I can do to help as I am of course not there when he is at nursery!

Thanks so much!

How many hours is he at nursery per day?

May be related to the proximity of peers. If he has sensory needs the noise of cutlery, children eating and the smell of food cooking or on plates may all mean that he can’t eat or drink.
Have Nursery tried letting him eat at a different time or in another area? I know this may be difficult due to staffing etc.
Does he respond to symbols? Now and Next? First and Then? If so you could try e.g. drink then bubbles ( favoured activity)
Does Nursery have an area senco or visiting specialist teacher who could observe and offer strategies?

@Batbatbatty he is there from around 9am until just before 6pm when I pick him up for 3 days a week.

@24Dogcuddler that’s true I never thought of that, nursery have mentioned he is happier throughout the day when less of the children are in. I believe he eats with the other children so this could be worth a mention actually, as they are at a point that they don’t know what else they can do. They have been using Now and Next boards with him for transitions and it does seem to work to stop him becoming distressed which is good, SENCo have been out to see him and did an observation, he has a support plan in place but only 3 targets currently for communication and language to be reviewed next month. I may suggest First and Then with them though as this could help. I’m at the point where now it’s worrying me, at first they assured me he was just protesting as some children do but it just seems to be getting worse not better!

Ah okay, I suppose if it was just for a morning or similar then it wouldn't be so much of a worry, but that's a long day for him without food and drink.

Won’t be a protest and they mustn’t treat him as if he is doing something wrong. Sounds like they are working with you though.
Don’t know if ear defenders would help?

I work in a nursery and any of the SEN children or children who get over whelmed at lunch time can sit separate with a member of staff where it’s a bit quieter. Could this be an option?x

Sorry, just seen that’s been suggested. If you can speak to nursery about it, that would be good, it really does help the SEN children at our nursery!

Definitely ask they try feeding him away from the other children.

Also if you are paying for the meals ask for them to be sent home and then see if he will eat them at home. That will help you work out if it's the food or the environment but won't hurt to confirm that.