Calm parenting strategies

[Sushiandunagi]

Hey there, just wanted to see if anyone can recommend a good book or a course on calm parenting please? I feel like I’m all too frequently raging when kids are just being kids (not listening, being too loud, being too rough with each other). And I somehow need to install a safety valve because I go from 0 to 100 within seconds. Funnily enough before I had kids I have always been cool calm and collected. I keep telling myself my kiddos are having tough time not giving me tough time but I fail to stop myself from reacting most of the times. This makes me all too consumed with guilt and then I make more poor decisions. Really not proud of the way I’m handling things at the moment.

Sending solidarity, being a good parent is really hard! Most books I’ve read recommended looking after yourself and also exploring your own childhood to work through any triggers that your own parents struggled with. Noise is a huge one for me! Interesting that you say you were cool and collected pre kids - I would say the same about myself, although I wonder if I was born that way or actually learned to suppress my loud voice in childhood thanks to the punitive parenting I had. I like dr marta psychologist and dr Kate Silvertown for resources on Instagram, both have books as well as lots of helpful free content.

I really like the ‘how to talk to little kids’ book

@Dryshampoofordays thanks for solidarity! Yeah I feel like I hear my mum’s voice instead of my own sometimes and it’s really scary. Thank you for the recommendations, I’ll have a look!

@MonkeyPuddle ooh that’s a good one! I’ve read it before my first probably should re-read it.

I never got on well with how to talk. Too much dancing around the kids for my liking. Quite liked a book called what to do when kids push your buttons, or something to that effect. It frames things as my agenda vs your kids agenda, and how to meet in the middle and understand what it is they're doing when they just piss you off 😁