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When did you put your kids into their own rooms?

13 replies

Zd24 · 23/01/2025 18:19

We have 3 kids, a 9 year old girl,7 year old boy and 15 month old baby girl.(10,8 and 2 at the end of this year!) Currently our eldest girl and boy are sharing and are in bunk beds. They’ve always shared a room and our third bedroom has always been a “guest room” / office. Baby girl is still in with us and will be for the foreseeable until she’s a bit older as she still isn’t sleeping through the night, we are planning to move and looking at houses, had 2 offers on 2 different houses rejected already. My husband is a builder so we want a property that he will extend so eventually all 3 of our children will have their own rooms so that’s the plan.
as buying a house will take time and extension work will take time I’m considering putting my sons room in the “box room” which is a very good size and can fit a double bed, will put the bunk beds in that room as his room and the double beds that is in the guest room will go into the second bedroom for my daughter that currently both the kids are sharing.

my daughter has been asking for a long time for her own room as she feels she has no privacy, my son has started asking now to and I was thinking in the mean time whilst we are waiting to move I should give them their own rooms as we are practically wasting space in the 3rd bedroom as we only occasionally use it.

my husband has said he thinks they are still fine sharing for now but our older daughter has started saying she has now started saying she has no privacy and I also want to teach the older kids about responsibility and taking care of their own rooms.

wwyd?
I’ve spoke to my kids and they both want their own room but husband is saying they are fine as they are till we move but that could take months?

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MrsSamR · 23/01/2025 18:23

Unless I'm missing something it seems obvious to me that if you have a spare room you barely use and both your older kids have expressed they'd like their own space that you would honour their wishes?! My 2 girls have each had their own rooms since 6 months old and it works well for us.

redandpinkandwhite · 23/01/2025 18:25

If she’s asking then you really should have acted before now. It’s obviously different if you haven’t got space but even then there are ways to manage the situation.

Children should never have to ask for privacy. It should be granted without question.

Meadowfinch · 23/01/2025 18:31

DS had his own room at 3y2months. He helped me choose how it was decorated, and I would put him to bed in it every evening.

For at least a year after that, he would come and climb in with me during the night. 😊

It seems odd to prevent your dcs from having their own rooms, on the off chance that you have an occasional visitor. Are they really so unimportant to you?

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neleh87 · 23/01/2025 18:35

I'm thinking of this at the moment as I'm pregnant with DD and I have a DS! We have a 2 bed house which we really love so are pondering our options for the future. I'd definitely like them to have separate rooms by the time the eldest is 9 so that will mean moving or perhaps a loft conversion. In your case I would use the space room.

Zd24 · 23/01/2025 18:53

Meadowfinch · 23/01/2025 18:31

DS had his own room at 3y2months. He helped me choose how it was decorated, and I would put him to bed in it every evening.

For at least a year after that, he would come and climb in with me during the night. 😊

It seems odd to prevent your dcs from having their own rooms, on the off chance that you have an occasional visitor. Are they really so unimportant to you?

Edited

My husband is Asian,Pakistani. so for him sharing rooms with siblings is the norm. I’m perfectly happy for them to have their own room it’s my husband who is telling me leave them and they are fine for now!

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Helpel · 23/01/2025 19:03

My girls are only 16 months apart so have always shared as they like to do everything together and have found comfort being with each other at night. However since the eldest turned 9 she started to make noises about her own room. 6 months later we started reorganising our space to give them a room each. She turns 10 in summer and my little one is 8. It feels like the right time, although we think they'll still spend most nights in each others rooms/beds!

Cheezewizz · 23/01/2025 19:05

When my ds was 11 and dd was 10, we waited as long as possible as we live in two bedroom house so now I don’t have a bedroom and I sleep in front room which isn’t ideal but I couldn’t cope with the stress of them arguing and complaining about no privacy!

Cremeeggtime · 23/01/2025 19:07

you need to stick up for your children. It's fine for mixed sex dc sharing up to the point where one of them doesn't want to anymore!

jerensia · 23/01/2025 19:23

I come from a background where I shared rooms all my childhood and tbh it made me resolute that my dcs wouldn't have to share when I was older!
I definitely think a 9yo should have some privacy from an opposite sex sibling. She could get her first period in the next year.

brummumma · 23/01/2025 19:42

I have boy/girl twins and even I plan to get them their own room by age 9. I definitely think age 10 for a girl is too old to share with a younger brother

HippeePrincess · 23/01/2025 19:47

Unfortunately my opposite sex children had to share til they were 8 & 11 as we were in a 2 bed and had no other option. I simply don’t understand why you still have them sharing when you have a spare disused room, completely unfair to your older DD.

Zd24 · 25/01/2025 09:57

Thanks everyone for your replies. Husband has agreed and our 9 year old will be getting the bigger room as she is the oldest and 7 year old will be moving into the box room. I did explain to my husband that as it is going to take time for us to move ( could be ages) we need to make the most of the space in this house we have and we are technically wasting our 3 bedroom because no one is using it.

will hopefully change their rooms this weekend, dd is excited about having her own room now and making it how she wants! Ds is also happy he’s going into his own room now but wanted the bigger room, I did explain to him his sister is older so she gets the bigger room plus she has a lot more things as she has so many books as she loves reading etc so needs the bigger room anyway.

thanks everyone!

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Rocknrollstar · 05/09/2025 08:42

Just to say that when DD was on a gap year she gave up the bigger room and let her brother have it as he was still studying

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