Paternity leave

[Livingmydream25]

My husband gets the standard 2 weeks paternity and wants to take a 3rd as annual leave. He's trying to decide whether to take it straight away or go back to work for a bit (whilst the novelty is still there and people want to come round) and then take the extra week a bit later. Advice please xx

Does he have much flexibility? I was in and out of hospital with DD1 and we didn’t get home properly until she was 11 days. An extra week straight away was needed.

My labour was pretty much normal (forceps). My husband took his 2 weeks. I wanted him to have a 3rd straight away but because of his job and the time of year he was unable to get it off.

For me it was just hard adjusting to life with a baby. My mum came down a lot that 3rd week because I just felt scared to be alone.

Not saying that you will feel like that also.

I would also suggest only having immediate family those first few weeks. People came that has never bothered since and I felt like my husband and myself lost time I would have rather had resting or bonding alone.

I'll echo the need for flexibility if you can get it. Whether you'll need your husband during that third week really depends on your birth, how you feel emotionally and physically, and what other support you have available to step in. If you end up having a c-section, you will likely need somebody to support you with practical things at least, but that person doesn't necessarily need to be your DH. Just make sure you feel comfortable being a bit vulnerable in front of whoever you choose to take his place if necessary, and that they're going to be a genuine help rather than 'guests' you need to take care of! 3 weeks postpartum is no time to be the hostess with the mostess in my opinion!

My husband took two weeks and we spent every day but the last day in hospital due to a long induction and then post birth complications. Then the week after when he was technically back at work we had all the visitors/ midwives/ health visitor etc. Luckily he was able to "work" from home and his job were understanding but it wasn't ideal! I also couldn't drive due to C section so he had to take us to appointments.

This time his work policy has actually changed so he's taking 3 months!

Does your husband have any more holiday he could take later on in the year?

Thank you everyone. His work are really inflexible and they've basically said decide now or forever hold your peace 🙈
Tbh they told him today that they are unlikely to approve any annual leave on top of the two weeks paternity- a lot of them are string believers that even that is a lot of time!