What works for you when it comes to disciplining your DC?

[DevilwearsPrada]

After my smacking thread it got me thinking about what methods other people use. Why do use the methods you do? Do they work? Did you discuss them with you're DP before you had kids?

I use a mixture of many, which including smacking. I use the naughty step (complete waste of time IME), time out, taking away toys and privledges (like TV) for a certain amount of time, this is all after they have been told no several times.

Do you think programmes like Supernanny and their ilk have clouded parents faith in their own judgement or do you think they're a good thing that helps parents?

lock em in a box

Being sent to their room has always been a surprisingly effective punishment for us. i don't know why - it just makes them cry. The threat of it is enough to get an effect sometimes. I use it very sparingly - about 4 times a year? Only for a few minutes each time.

My kids take the piss most of the time, but get 'sent to their room' for hitting an adult or when all other sanctions have failed. HTH

my methods have changed with ds's age.
Now aged 4 nearly 5 i use:
Withdrawl of privilages. This is very dependant on his "currency".
At the moment he is into dressing up in costumes...spiderman etc.
These will be taken off him for a set amount of time.
Treats not allowed.
Send him to his room.

BUT i also use positive praise ALOT.
Stickers still work great.

Got some good tips off supernanny actually.
And had many things confirmed that i was doing ok woth punishment.

I have posted 500000 times about my boys behaviour, he is and always has been extremely hard work and a continuous struggle. These things work for us for a moment then we are onto the next spate of nightmareish behaviour....on and on it goes.

We've never punished in a traditional sense i.e. naughty steps, taking stuff away etc. Maybe it's because we have a big age gap i.e ds is 12 and dd 4 that they've grown up without sibling rivalry. We have always gone with the distraction, redirecting,persuation, talking etc.
Ds has never been in trouble at school and dd although can be strong willed at home has never been in trouble at nursery.

I do shout sometimes but that's more aboutme losing patience than them.

Ds is 5 yo and responds to a count down and/or last chance with consequence attached. Dd is 7 yo and raised voice and stern look is working at the moment. She defies everything else. Both well behaved most of the time but they are only human

I grew up in Sweden so as far as I'm concerned the time-honoured learnt-from-the-older generation methods are the non-smacking ones; smacking would be something untried and alien to me. It may work, but it's not something that would come naturally.

Have to admit I'm not a great sticker chart person either.

Instead we've got along with a mixture of deep-parental-NO, removing child from situation, naughty step when they were little, confiscation of toys, docking of pocket money (rarely) and simply taking the child by the hand and leading them to the place they need to go/the job that needs to be done. A lot of the time, calmly repeating that 'I am the person in charge' gets results.

Dd used to have violent temper tantrums when little, during which I would restrain her firmly but gently but not hit her. She is now 11 and has reached a level of maturity where we can usually sort things out by discussion. Though I do sometimes send her to her room.

Ds (7) still needs more discipline (as above), as he is still at the hyper-little-boy stage.

Neither has been in trouble at school. I think it helps that most of the time we get on well at home, and they get on well with other adults. I wouldn't say they're perfect, sometimes I do find them trying, but I am not worried about their futures.

Can't say Supernanny has done anything to dock my confidence- but that may be because I never watched it . I'm basically doing with my children what my parents did with me.

Time out in room (more for the sake of all of us calming down than for discipline as such), plus 'natural consequences' when possible. Ie yesterday when DD refused to do any share of the chores, waited (about 5 minutes) until she wanted me to help her find something, then explained that I had no time since she refused to help me. Unlike the what I've read in parenting books, this always involves a lot of shouting and slamming of doors (on dd's part, not mine).
The trouble I find is dealing with not so much downright bad behaviour, but sort of inbetween low level rudeness and unhelpfulness.
I'm thinking of trying something along the sticker chart line though, not so much for stopping her doing things, as encouraging her to be more generally helpful and politer.

Mour children are now 21,18 and 16. But when they were children we used a variety of discipline metods like you do devilwearsprada. But we did not just punish we made sure they were given lots of praise and knew that we loved them at all time. We still make sure they know they are loved.
I get very annoyed with supernanny. She is not a mother and does not have any childcare qualifications at all.

My DD is 8
We discuss stuff but have no "discipline".
My dd is well behaved & not naughty, willful or stubborn.

Supernanny advocates discipline but not physical discipline and this approach is probably now the mainstrean approach imo.

However I just don't think punishments are necessary. I think kids need plenty of love and attention, proper sleep, exercise & diet, and a good role model of how to behave from their mother.

The children get threatened with being sent to their room if they cannot behave well enough to be pleasant company for everyone else.

The threat is nearly always sufficient to make them behave.

They also get told why they need to do things now eg to have a bath and wash their teeth and get dressed because we are going out (and if they don't do this, they will have to stay behind).

Time out when DS was smaller but it doesn't really work now because he doesn't care. Now I remove fun things like computer/tv time or pocket money, take them straight home if they misbehave while out - have only ever had to do it twice. Tell them I will cancel outings or treats if they don't behave and I do when necessary, they know I mean it.

I don t discipline DD really - she is 20 months old and I don t think kids are "naughty" at that age. Just distract, remove from situation etc.