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Original poster

Sudden irrational fears in 4 year old

7 replies

tiredmumof4yearold · 05/01/2025 12:37

Can anyone help me with this please

My 4 soon to be 5 year old has suddenly developed fears, like it happened overnight.

The fears are being in a room alone so following me everywhere again, the dark ( needing a lamp on a night, already has a nightlight) and basically being as close as possible to me in the night, we co sleep, that has always worked really well for us. We've had plenty of space and a good nights sleep. Now they are basically lying on my head because they constantly have to feel close.

Up until recently they slept well, 7-7.30 and slept in their own space in the bed with just a night light. It's like somebody flicked a switch and now they are up screaming for me to put the lamp on at 4 am, also having nightmares etc, too scared to use toilet alone etc. last night woke at 11, 4 and then up for day at 6.

Is this a development thing, common at this age, that others have experienced or should I seek some advice please?

Thanks

OP posts:
Winterwellies · 05/01/2025 12:43

If this has just started perhaps they are worrying about going back to school after the break, it's a long time for a 4 year old.

HPandthelastwish · 05/01/2025 12:46

Common at that age, they also tend to develop a weird obsession about death around 4 too.
These clippy lights are good and can be attached to a head board, you just squeeze the circle bit to turn it on Argos clip light or when DD was in a high sleeper I stuck those battery push lights on the side so she could turn it on easily

Original poster
tiredmumof4yearold · 05/01/2025 13:06

Winterwellies · 05/01/2025 12:43

If this has just started perhaps they are worrying about going back to school after the break, it's a long time for a 4 year old.

Thank you. Yes I think of anything he's missing school and out of routine. He does seem to enjoy going and always asking when he's going back

OP posts:

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Original poster
tiredmumof4yearold · 05/01/2025 13:07

HPandthelastwish · 05/01/2025 12:46

Common at that age, they also tend to develop a weird obsession about death around 4 too.
These clippy lights are good and can be attached to a head board, you just squeeze the circle bit to turn it on Argos clip light or when DD was in a high sleeper I stuck those battery push lights on the side so she could turn it on easily

Edited

Thank you
I'll have a look at the light. Good to know it can be common 👍🏻

OP posts:
overthinker345 · 15/10/2025 21:42

tiredmumof4yearold · 05/01/2025 12:37

Can anyone help me with this please

My 4 soon to be 5 year old has suddenly developed fears, like it happened overnight.

The fears are being in a room alone so following me everywhere again, the dark ( needing a lamp on a night, already has a nightlight) and basically being as close as possible to me in the night, we co sleep, that has always worked really well for us. We've had plenty of space and a good nights sleep. Now they are basically lying on my head because they constantly have to feel close.

Up until recently they slept well, 7-7.30 and slept in their own space in the bed with just a night light. It's like somebody flicked a switch and now they are up screaming for me to put the lamp on at 4 am, also having nightmares etc, too scared to use toilet alone etc. last night woke at 11, 4 and then up for day at 6.

Is this a development thing, common at this age, that others have experienced or should I seek some advice please?

Thanks

I could have written this about my almost 4 yo! How did things pan out OP? I’m at my wits end and absolutely shattered!!!

Original poster
tiredmumof4yearold · 15/10/2025 23:16

things are much better now. He still can be clingy and follow me from room to room, but this initial bit that was quite bad only lasted a week or so. It eased off gradually. It was definitely some sort of development stage. We are now at 5.5 into nightmares and stalling bedtime with every excuse going!

OP posts:
overthinker345 · 16/10/2025 10:25

whats his personality like overall? DD is quite shy and I wonder whether it’s linked or something I can help her with

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