Hi all!
I am looking for some advice on how to deal with my daughters father.
We split a year and half ago due to him being verbally and emotionally abusive, our daughter is 3.
Since we have split he has always been extremely inconsistent with seeing her no matter how many times we have set days and times together etc but recently since around October he is seeing less and less of her and there seems to be an excuse every time now and he dosent tell me until maybe an hour before hes seeing her most of the time. So any plans i have always have to be cancelled etc all sorts of excuses, mental health, no money for petrol, too tired..🙃
I have been writing down days/ weeks he is not seeing her and it’s all adding up pretty quickly but the advice I want is that next week she is starting a new time with her nursery, from afternoons to mornings , he is not working and hasn’t been for a while and when I asked him going forward what would be the routine he said we would “figure it out” i explained I am not willing to wait in until 1/2 in the afternoon and waste the day for him not to show up as he does so frequently. My daughter will finish at half 10.
He could easily have her straight after school but he sleeps in all day to early afternoon every day so I know he simply cant be bothered to see her so early at half past 10.
he used to see her 2.15 to 5 when she was afternoons in school but he would cancel that very often as well, I didn’t mind him seeing her in the afternoon then as the mornings we wouldn’t go anywhere far but now we have the whole day it just annoys me that I will take her home, wait for him and he’s likely not to even come.
what im trying to say is am I being unreasonable expecting him to have her straight from nursery at half 10 ( he literally just has to get up earlier) instead of waiting until 1/2 where he may show up or he might not? I just don’t want to waste the day when I know it’s more than likely he won’t come anyway! And I would then be extremely annoyed to have wasted days out with my daughter waiting on him.
we do not have a court order but this is something I certainly need to look into.
any advice is appreciated