Toddler angrily throwing, how can I help him?

[Toddlertroubles00]

DS is 23 months, at any minor inconvenience he gets frustrated with what he is doing e.g his toys he is playing with fall on the floor. He proceeds to throw multiple toys across the room angrily. When told off by us , he often throws heavy toys directly at us or at others. Its happened at a family event and caused my 89 year old grandmother to be hurt by him throwing a heavy toy at her head.

He often kicks and hits us when we try and get him
To do something he doesn't want to do - e.g have his nappy changed or get dressed.

It's really getting terrible, any time at home is now stressful and upsetting. He is continuously throwing and getting upset.

Today we opted to try to discipline him by putting him in his highchair for 2 mins. Which he wasn't happy about and cried for the duration. He needs to learn boundaries Especially where is he causing physical harm to others. He cannot aggressively throw like this, yes he is young but what can I do to start to stop this?

Having spoken to other mum friends, none others of his age seem to be as bad as him!

I'm desperate for some advice

Redirect. Have some soft balls/bean bags/small cushions at hand for him to throw instead and remove the heavy/breakable stuff.

@Bambooozle the thing is, pretty much all his toys are heavy! If i left him with soft toys that would be toys for a very young baby!

A lot of this behaviour stems from boredom , he has a short attention span. We take the toy away if he throws it, in hope he will learn not to do it?!

I'd avoid the high chair for discipline to be honest as you don't really want him getting negative associations with being in there, in case it makes mealtimes tricky.

Any time my ds threw a toy at that age, especially aggressively, I made a point of taking it away and sternly (but not shouting/being derogatory etc) telling him "we do not throw, this is going away now" and redirecting to something else, preferably a change of scene even just going to another room.

What do you do when he hits and kicks?

If nappy changes are an ordeal, maybe think about potty training - we started with our son a few weeks before his 2nd birthday and it went so much better than we thought it would!

Yes, that's what I mean. He throws a heavy tractor, you say 'we don't throw tractors as this is heavy' and take it away, then say 'if you want to throw things, here are some balls to throw.'

The highchair thing won't work as it will make no sense at this age, it has no logical connection to throwing toys. Also agree with PP that you don't want him to associate it with punishment.

You might find reading How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen useful.

The boundary is not hurting, so you take away the things that can hurt once they're thrown or whatever. For kicking or hitting it's a calm 'I'm not going to let you hurt me' and stop him, and then redirect eg you can hit a cushion, kick a ball.

So one of you needs to be watching him up close all the time.
At sign of frustration-

Distraction- "hey look at this , shall we see how it works." "Are you hungry come and get a snack. " These are if you get in before the reaction.

Redirect- remove toy he's about to throw. " we don't throw this toy, let's throw this instead" as suggested above soft balls, beanbags,cushion.

Regulate - be calm, encourage him to calm, offer a cuddle or suggest laying on the floor fora minute. Not punishment just an opportunity to reset. A drink or food may also help.

Your poor 89 year old grandmother. I hope she's OK now.