So I have a son from a previous relationship who is now 5 (his 'dad' was never in the picture and my now partner came into our lives when he was 1 - he now calls him dad and is his father as far as he's concerned) and my partner has a girl who is 8 from a previous relationship
Our families have blended well and as far as I thought my son had been accepted into my other half's family as his son (we plan to make it official by adoption soon). My family always get my step daughter the exact same as my son. He doesn't get without her getting the same.
Now this Christmas my son received 3 parcels and a box of chocolates from my partners family (amazing, very grateful) however my step daughter then received 3 full bags of designer gear, trainers, make up, toys etc. it was excruciating watching my son watch her open her presents. Thankfully I don't think he's old enough to make the connection that she got more but it's made it clear in my head that he is now equal in their eyes.
We now have a newborn baby too-I've made it clear to my partner that while I would never take away from step daughter if that's what she gets from her grandparents but my two boys will never receive more than each other so going forward if it happens again I will just refuse the extra gifts for my second son. I don't care if it's a £3 toy each as long as they receive the same.
My question is am I overreacting? I feel it's unfair especially when my 5 year old has called my partner dad, we're due to get married and my partner plans to officially adopt him. Oh and they also FaceTimed my step daughter while she was with her mum today and didn't bother to FaceTime us with the two boys 🙃
Honestly feel heartbroken for my boy.