How do I explain to my 4yr old that the cat's being put down on Friday??

[babydriver]

Sensitive one here I'm afraid. Any tips? We've started paving the way about the cat being really old and very ill, but how do I explain about the fact that the vet will actually be bumping her off on Friday morning?

Be prepared for seemingly heartless indifference too. My 4 year old just didn't seem to get it at the time.

Sorry to hear about your cat - hope you ar eok.

Not sure what you should say but don't use the expression "put to sleep" as this might cause a few problems.

The cat is poorly & has to go to the Vet's

While he was at the Vet's he died

At 4 not too many details

Yeah my kids are totally matter of fact about death, and matter of fact about the fact that people feel sad about it. They get it but they don't seem to get very upset about it.

our cat was put down when DS1 was 3 but I wouldn't handle it any differently now a year on.

He knew Poppy was poorly, he knew we were going to say goodbye to her. He stroked her head before waiting outside in the reception at the vets whilst DH and I were in the room and Poppy was put to sleep.

He then came with us to my Mums house but wasn't involved in us planting her under an apple tree in the orchard. He wasn't very bothered he did ask where she was a few times and we said that she had died. He never asked us what that meant.

Sorry that you are going to go through this

Agree totally with KatyMac. We had a whippet who was 11 and got put down. My Kids at the time were 6 and 4. I went to a friends house while mil took the dog to the vet to do the necessary. She phoned me when it was done and I told the kids that she had gone in to check on the dog and she was gone. I would say that the cat has to go into the vet, then later say it died while it was at the vet. Kids are VERY accepting of death, it is us that have the problem with it. Hope you are okay.

sorry for the double post. useful stuff here though, thank you. i'll be avoiding put to sleep (I hate that phrase anyway). Don't think DS will be all that fussed - he's already been bugging me about "When Rosie dies can I have a rabbit/goldfish/dog...?" but it's the actual fact of knowing and dealing with the fact that it will happen on Friday at the vet that I was having a bit of difficulty getting my head round. Think I'll be able to manage with the various thoughts on these threads, thanks a lot.

My 4yo tends to show heartless indifference. we've had 2 dead cats and 2 dead hamsters this last winter, (one of each type put down). She's been most interested in whether we can dig up the buried cat to see what the corpse might look like.

i agree children are often less bothered about these things than we expect. Even my animal loving sensitive 8yo wasn't actually that upset about the cat being put down, I was quite surprised. She just took it for granted.

Hope all goes well today (as well as it can)
thinking about you

Thanks for the support. All went OK. DH went to the vet while I was at work, and DS seems pretty unconcerned.