Am I too old?

[KellyMarie1988]

Hello everyone, hope your all well.
Just after some advice really, I'm almost 36 years old, single and my son is almost 18 years old!

I've really been feeling my age recently, feeling like I'm getting too old and worrying about the fact that I never had another child (I did really want another one years ago)
But I don't really know where I stand or where this worry and anxiety has come from at the prospect of not having another child 😂 Maybe a midlife crisis 😂
I also worry that if I did have another child, there would be a huge age gap between a new baby and my son (he'd be a adult)

I don't really know what advice I'm after. I guess I just needed to get my worries and thoughts out 😭😭

I forgot to add that I've been obsessively goggling about IVF and Sperm donors 😂 So it must definitely be playing on mind and mean something to me.

Am I too old to start again?

PS (I'd need to find a man first) 😂😂

31 is now the average age of a first time mother in the UK. Most people have children in their 30s. I don't understand why you think 36 is old to have a child? It's nothing out of the ordinary at all.

No, of course not.

older siblings can be great!!

I had mine at 36 and 38

You're not too old at all but do you really want to start again? You've had years of sleepless nights and having to get babysitters. Plus there the Nusery fees to think of.

Do you really want another or is it just the thought that you probably won't have one? I found it hard to accept that there woukd be no more but I'm glad we didn't. Circumstances changed and it would have been very difficult with another.

Plus do you really want a Teenager in the house when you're going through the Peri?

i have just started all again at 32 (surprise baby lol) my other children aren’t adult but there is a 9 year age gap between my youngest and baby, its hard work going back to sleepless nights, nappy changes, clingy baby, breastfeeding again but ive not once regretted keeping her, she has added so much joy to the house (not that we were miserable before of course lol) the older kids adore her and she loves having lots of big brothers n sisters to play with, and although its hard work i forgot how much i miss the baby stage where everything is new to them and the wonder and curiosity they express at everything is adorable lol i don’t think 35/36 is too old to start again, my mum remarried and started again and had 3 more at 34,35 and 38 xx

Of course you're not too old. People have babies well into their 40's.

Am 40 with 7 kids however, my youngest was 14 when I started again my baby is now 2! So there is a 14 year difference & can honestly say best decision ever having another later on in life! Your not to old! Xx

I know a few with big gaps. Seems fine.
But you say ivf and sperm donor - I think you are concentrating on the wrong thing. I do know someone who had two kids in her late 30s/early 40s via sperm donor but her mother moved in to provide childcare so she could work full time to afford them!

I have an 18 year gap between dc1 and dc2, I had dc2 aged 38. I had no issues with the pregnancy or birth, and finances weren't a problem (I went back to being a sahm). But I wouldn't have done it with a donor or used IVF - the stats for IVF weren't looking good for my age so I didn't think it was worth paying for, and I wouldn't have wanted to raise a baby without a partner to help.

Only you would know if you really want to do this. It’s impossible for anyone to know whether it would be possible or not. It would be difficult for sure. My advice would be to wait it out. My hormones went mental at 35/36 and I was desperate to have another baby but it wouldn’t have been a good decision for us, so I waited and it did eventually pass, though I still get sad about it sometimes. It was actually at that stage that peri started for me, and if I had wanted to get pregnant I’d say it would have been very difficult and taken a while if it happened at all. I’m not saying this to try put you off. A lot of people will say 36 is young and you won’t have difficulty in that way but that’s not true for everyone. You wouldn’t know til you try I suppose. Good luck x