Too long in a car seat?

[Jajajagi]

I have a 3 year old and am due to give birth in January. My 3 yr old goes to nursery 30 minutes drive away but with traffic and getting ready it can take a little bit longer. His nursery is really lovely, he loves it there, the staff are wonderful and it's close to my work, but I obviously won't be going to work while on maternity but I'd like him to stay there as he gets so much out of it. He only goes two days a week but it would be an hour round trip for me and the new baby twice a week to get him there. He goes from 9am - 3pm.

I have considered sending him somewhere else closer but there are only 2 nurseries that are available full time immediately - one had serious safeguarding issues and were deemed inadequate (child went missing and they didn't realise and then didn't update any procedures), and the other has terrible reviews. There are 2 other good year round nurseries but they don't have availability until the autumn but it's not guaranteed as they have long waiting lists and don't let you know who has a space until April/May. There are preschools etc but they are only term time and that won't work with my work when I get back.

I'm thinking of just keeping my son at his usual nursery but then that means driving for ages with the baby. I could stop and take the baby out for a bit so the journeys are split into 4x 30 minutes rather than a solid hour each way. I'll have help from family for the first month so it would only be from when they baby is 1 month old onwards.

Is this too much time on the car seat for the little one? Is it silly to drive all that way? Struggling to work out what the best thing to do is for all of us! Thanks

I think it will be fine if your baby is full-term and a healthy weight and you take them out for a bit at nursery. It's not ideal, but better than your older child being disrupted if you are then going to need him in nursery again when you go back to work.

Is a lie flat car seat an option? Supposedly better if baby's in the seat often apparantly..

I'd keep the routine if you can, will they both be going there when you return to work? If so I definitely wouldn't consider moving him, a new baby will be disruptive enough without having to resettle in a new place too.
I'd invest in a lie flat car seat, worth it if baby's going to using it regularly for long periods, and take them out of it when you get to the nursery for a bit

It's not ideal, especially if the baby turns out not to like the car seat and cries the whole way! But I think it's definitely good to keep your eldest in nursery for early years education, and the nearby options don't sound good. I'd get a lie flat car seat and take the baby out after 30 mins. When the older child starts school, will you still need to do a long journey?

Are there any baby groups you can go to that are near the nursery to make the most of the trip? Or even just nice coffee shops that you can go to with baby. Or shops for a stroll with the pram or sling?

We had a lie flat car seat and it was brilliant

Definitely keep your LO at the same nursery - sounds really beneficial for him.

From 4 weeks it's OK to have them in the car seat up to 2 hours at a time, it doesn't need to be a lie flat one, though it should have a newborn insert. An hour or so even if it ends up being 1h20 with the time you go into the nursery and help sort out DC1. It's really only the very early days where you need to worry about shorter journeys. I expect you'll likely find that you end up shaping the day's routine around those two times so he has a bit of a nap. Or if he wakes up when you go inside, then he'll probably be happy to come out of the seat for a bit which provides a natural break, too.

I found it so helpful to keep my older one at the childcare he was used to so he had a bit of time and space of his own away from the new baby.

Definitely think the benefit to your older child outweighs any miniscule risk to the baby here