How do you deal with young children who are saying hurtful things about your appearance?

[SillyKitty]

So yesterday I was sitting on the couch with my 4.4-year-old son. Suddenly he said to me ' mummy, you don't have a beautiful face'. I was flabbergasted, and hurt. I have acne scarring on my face and I know that's what he meant because he tried to rub it away with a baby wipe.
I have done a lot to my scars in the past, with little result. It is really very difficult to improve it. I have been depressed about it so needless to say, I am very sensitive to this kind of criticism, even if the criticism comes from a 4 year old. I asked him after it, "Don't you like mommy's face?" to which my son said he does think it's beautiful. I hate that I feel so sad, I feel so childish but I can't help it.

I don't really know what i want with this post. Maybe rant? Maybe hear stories from other parents who have been hurt by their child?

I think you could say something like, that's a mean thing to say DS, you can hurt someone's feelings by saying unkind things.
He didn't mean to hurt you but he has to start learning socially appropriate behaviour.
Sorry your feelings were hurt, kids can be brutal.

My 3 yo called me fat the other day (I'm not fat, just 5 weeks postpartum)

But yeah, as above. You just have to remember they aren't trying to hurt, and tell them that it's not nice to talk about people's appearance.

I'm sorry because I get that that must have been really hurtful. And it doesn't really help to know he didn't mean it. He's at a stage when he wouldn't think of it that way. But you can see from his second reply that he actually doesn't want to hurt you, because he'd caught on then to you not feeling good about his reply. My DS could say thoughtless things when that age, and now he's older he is very protective and would defend me against any criticism. Yours will be the same.

You remind yourself that you wouldn't unconditionally accept their opinion or advice on pretty much anything else, because they're 4.

I’m sure that hurt, but I’d just ignore it. It’s a 4 year old stating a fact. I wouldn’t make him feel bad.

My friend still remembers her toddler repeatedly pointing out her ‘fat tummy’. Through gritted teeth, she’d always say something like ‘I know, isn’t it lovely?’.