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13yo son deleting history

3 replies

Ghdppp1 · 05/12/2024 12:16

Just want to gauge opinions on the following situation since me and DH don't seem to be on the same page.

DS has an iPad and phone. He has restricted access to the phone a few times a week. He had fairly unrestricted access to the iPad and used it whenever he liked. Since being homeschooled temporarily this term, I placed a parental lock on the iPad after I found him wasting time on YouTube when he was supposed to be doing online lessons during the day. In the evening I remove the parental lock If he wants to use the device. DS has form for lying and deleting internet history in the past and we've addressed this with him.

Yesterday I forgot to place the parental lock on again when he went to sleep, then I went to work the next day. So DS had unrestricted access to the iPad for an entire day while he was supposed to be studying. When I came home to check his school work, I noticed he'd deleted the internet history. I mentioned it in passing this morning to DS and told him the parental lock was back on and we'd be checking his work that evening. He was polite and didn't contest this at all.

My husband thinks I'm being obsessive and unreasonable about the matter, and suggests that DS being sneaky like this is normal behaviour for his age.

What do you guys think?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Comedycook · 05/12/2024 12:18

Do you have filters on so certain things will be filtered out when he searches for things? That gives some peace of mind I guess.

Overall I agree with you rather than your DH though. You need to be mindful about this sort of thing

lunar1 · 05/12/2024 12:21

I think you do sound obsessive over checking, 13 is an age when children need to have some privacy from their parents.

It's a really difficult line to walk, but if your DS has picked up on how obsessive you are over it, he's going to use every method he can to hide things when he gets windows of freedom.

Birmingbacon · 05/12/2024 12:21

I agree with you

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