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Teacher asked for a chat...

35 replies

MortifiedMum1234 · 22/11/2024 10:36

Got the dreaded "can I have a quick chat" this morning at school drop off.

God knows how but I managed to send DD in yesterday with no knickers on (absolutely cant fathom how I've managed that, in all the 5 years I've been dressing her I've never managed to forget her underwear. We have all been ill, we have family member in hospital just generally alot on my mind and running on not much sleep which is obviously no excuse as its a pretty basic thing isnt is? To make it even worse I spent quite a lot of time plaiting her hair, put spare clothes in her bag encase she got wet playing in the snow, but didnt put any effing pants on her!

Apparently DD thought it would be funny to show another child in her class (she was wearing joggers, it was PE day) that she wasn't wearing pants, the child told their parents who then raised it with the teacher.

Teacher has assured me the other parents aren't upset as DD clearly found it hilarious and there was nothing more to it, but to be fair I probably wouldn't be happy if I was in their shoes. Teacher has said its not been raised as safe guarding issue but Im feeling a bit paranoid, you'd keep an eye on them wouldn't you?

Im mortified, firstly that I sent her in without pants and that she she thought it would be funny to flash another child - we've had all the chats, she knows it isn't appropriate. She wont even get changed in front of anyone other than me and her Dad, why would she think that's appropriate?! Is it just something kids think is funny, should I be worried?

I'll be having a chat with her tonight and make sure she knows its not appropriate but Im just so embarrassed, its a small village school, two of her friends mums are TA's at the school, we live minutes from the school and some of our neighbors children are in her class - I dread to even think who it is.

Should I speak to the child parents (assuming DD tells me who it was) I feel like I owe them an apology, they were obviously upset enough to mention it to the teacher?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Hoppinggreen · 22/11/2024 15:20

DS had pants aversion, in fact he had general clothes aversion to be honest.
I insisted for school but once when I asked him what he was most looking forward to during our upcoming holiday it was that he "didn't have to wear pants".
He grew out of it by around 7 or 8

twentysevendresses · 22/11/2024 15:38

Oh dear OP...honestly this happens a lot! I teach Year 3 this year, but have taught all primary year groups, and children arriving with no underwear is a regular occurrence. It's usually girls to be fair, as they are more likely to be dressing themselves from a younger age and they've just pulled on their tights without much thought (we find boys are 'dressed' for much longer by their parent, so generally come fully clothed ☺️).

And yes, with the really young ones, once they've realised, they usually find it funny enough to show/tell a friend (often quite a public Show And Tell to the entire playground! 🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️).

Don't fret about it (and maybe pop a couple of spare pairs in their PE bag to keep on their peg 😂)

thismummydrinksgin · 22/11/2024 15:46

My Husband did this when our daughter was wearing a dress!! 😂

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Motherofdragons20 · 22/11/2024 16:04

I don’t this the other day! Get my 4 year old dressed was heading out the door, only realised I had forgot the pants when my 1 year old came walking out with his sisters clean pants which had been sitting on the sofa on his head haha. TBH in that moment, in a rush and running late I momentarily debated if she really needed them haha, I then thought yes she really does, and yes we were late for nursery. Easily done, move on.

MortifiedMum1234 · 27/11/2024 14:41

Thanks for all the replies, you've made me feel much better. The teacher was fine and said it wouldn't be taken further but made it clear it was serious 😳so I was panicking a bit.

Had a chat to DD over the weekend and it was one of her friends she showed, whose mum happened to be a TA... I don't know if this makes things different in terms of her needing to mention it but in a way Im relieved because at least (I like to think) it wouldn't have been discussed with other random parents as obviously Id blown it completely out of proportion and was convinced everyone was talking about me. 🙄

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itsgettingweird · 27/11/2024 14:45

Your DD is 5 years old.

5.

She knows herself to wear knickers and didn't bother to say anything but rather point out to a friend she didn't have any and find it hilarious.

Again - she's 5!!!

Tell her not to forget to put her knickers in when she gets herself dressed in future and remind her it's not appropriate to flash your bare bum!

Theunamedcat · 27/11/2024 14:54

Ds lost his pants at school I know full well he had them on when he went to school and he wasn't able to dress himself properly at the time either so we didn't know what happened? I mentioned it to the staff but they never found them neither did we! They were his only mickey mouse pants too 😂

MortifiedMum1234 · 27/11/2024 14:59

Thank you, obviously children need to be taught what's appropriate (and I have been) but its a sad world we live in really where we have to be on the look out for children being harmed :(

She really did think it was funny and I suspect is linked to her obsession with farts at the moment - aren't children a delight!

DH actually reminded me of a few occasions its happened to DD in reception where other children had done similar, so it definitely happens.

OP posts:
Justploddingonandon · 27/11/2024 15:08

I did similar when DS was three. He dressed all by himself for the first time and excitedly told me (he'd done bit himself before but usually needed some help). I scanned his outfit to check nothing was undone, inside out or back to front but didn't think to check he'd actually put pants under his joggers. Off he went to nursery and only realised when he went to the toilet (at the same time as his friend), at which point he found it hilarious and came out the cubicle to show said friend. Nursery just reminded him that the bit under his pants was private (even if he wasn't wearing any), gave him the spare ones from his bag to put on, and told me on pick up in a it's great he can dress himself but you might want to check he hasn't forgotten anything way.

Sparklyhat · 27/11/2024 15:10

It happens! I was confused this morning as after the school run I found my sons (5yo) clean pants still here!! So either he's forgotten to change his pants today or isn't wearing any 🤦‍♀️

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