My partner encourages our 18 month old to hurt me

[KleRed]

Please don't bash me. I'm already at my limit 😔 I'm sorry it's a long one and I'm unsure if I'm posting in the right place.
My partner has been encouraging our 18 month old to hit me and throw things at me. Then says "good job" when she does. My partner is angry. He slaps and bites me and makes horrible comments about my appearance. My previous relationship gave me PTSD because it was mentally and emotionally abusive. I have no one to talk to because my ex partner isolated me and I haven't found it in myself to try and fix relationshios with people who believed my ex who described me as how he behaved. I feel like it's happening all over again and I don't know what to do anymore. I attend a domestic abuse group weekly to help get over what's happened before, I haven't mentioned my troubles with my new partner as you have to be free of them to take part in group, and it's my only safe space. I'm more scared of this partner than the last. I have 4 children aged 11 and up from my previous partner and 1 with my current.

Oh sweetheart xx
Please get out of there for you and your babies xx
Womens aid xx you know what to do. A refuge away from this psychopath xx

Please please please get yourself and your children away from this vile abusive creature, you must know you are worth more than this, your children are worth more than this. Please get help to get away op.

You need to report him to the police and end the relationship.

Him encouraging your child to hit you is a red herring.

He hits you himself. That should be in your thread title.

Anyway - you obviously need to kick him out. Can you tell someone at your support group, so they can help you? Or ask social services for help?

So sorry @KleRed You obviously need to get away with your children and keep them away from this partner. Hoping someone from the uk will be along with contacts for the right organisations.

Can you report him to the police for assault and call a dv site, are you in the UK, what's the house and financial situation.

Can you tell us whose house you're living in?
Is it his, or yours?
Do you rent, or own it?

Have you got a social worker?

You know this is wrong. And that he is wrong both what he does to you and how he encourages your child. That's why you've written here. It's the first step on your path to resolve this issue. You know you have to leave. It won't be easy but there are so many women on here who will help you with advice and support you along the way.
You can do this.

When you go to your DA meeting, please bring this up, it’s likely they can help you with next steps to flee.

@KleRed run away, as fast as you can. Save yourself and your children.

For the love of God, call Women's Aid.

0808 2000 247.

You have to get out of this relationship as soon as humanly possible.

Go to your nearest police station and report all his assaults. Show them bruises and bite marks.

Go to your GP and have the evidence of abuse noted.

If you have ANYWHERE that you can go with your toddler, pack a bag and leave today. Bring your identification documents, baby's medical records, and GO.

You need to go to the police. Go today.

The DA group isn't doing you any good if you're now experiencing abuse but can't talk about it.

Women's Aid number is 0808 2000 247.

I am so sorry that you are living like this .
you need to leave.
you did it before you can do it again .
you are strong .
you can do hard things
you want better for your children than this .
you know you do
this is why you are posting on here

go to your local children’s centre.
go to your children’s school.
go to a church
go to a library.

Ask for help.

you can do this .

OP, you know that infamously violent and disturbed trans individual Barbie Kardashian? That is their origin story. The father was violent to his mother and he encouraged the child to do the same. It caused significant psychological damage.

You left your previous abuser, now you can leave this one.

You know how to do it, you've done it before. You are completely capable of it. Your child hitting you will stop when you leave the man teaching your child to hit you.

Separately, I hope you are using contraception to ensure you don't get trapped with another baby.

@KleRed I know how hard this is going to be. I had to do it myself, back in 1989.
It took so much courage, but I got away, with two small children.

How many DC are living at home with you? All the four older ones, plus the toddler?

Can you call the police, get this man arrested and removed from the home, and go from there?
You can then get a Non- Molestation Order, to keep him away.

Have you got a social worker? They'll help you.

I think it's quite common for abused women to go into a second abusive relationship. They have low self esteem and so don't understand they deserve better. Tell your abuse group. They should be able to support you to either ask him to leave or for you and DD to leave. You will never feel safe and happy with this vile man. Also it's not good for your DD.

Don’t allow him to teach your child to be violent and abuse you. You and importantly your children deserve better. Please find the strength to end this situation.

That's really unkind and very unhelpful.
The OP doesn't need judgement. We don't know anything about her except that she's desperate and needs to leave this man.

Keep your unsupportive lecture to yourself.

Is it your house or his, do you own or rent. if it is yours and he has no legal claim on the property call the police and they can make him leave.

I live with my 5 children in a privately rented house. Only I am on the tenancy but my partner is registered with them as being here.
My ex partner was allowed to stay in my home when friends and family called police worried and the police were unhelpful. Even telling him there was nothing I could do to get him out. DA helped me get a non molestation order. My ex was on bail recently for harassment and even threatened me when his bail conditions stated not to contact me and again nothing was done. So I have no faith in them helping me. My ex wasn't on the tenancy either. I was with my ex for 20 years.
I have 2 teens with additional needs so I have to be careful how things happen.
I think I just needed someone to tell me it's all wrong as my ex still hassles me through our kids trying to convince me im crazy so I struggle to see things for what they are.
I have group tomorrow, I will speak to my group leader and go from there as my partner is around me until then. I have a separate DA worker I could call whilst at group.
My kids will always come first and I've only been experiencing these things recently.
Thank you all for taking the time. It really has helped.

Please tell the group leader and the DA advisor. This isn't healthy for you or the kids. Good luck

Email, chat or phone. Contact them ASAP ❤

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/