HELP! Clingy AF baby

[Megnj]

Hello, I am writing this post out of sheer desperation in the hopes of some hope, somebody to offer some advice or just to tell me they are currently going through the same thing so I am not alone. My 2nd child who is 13months is so incredibly clingy, to the point my house is a constant state because no matter how much I sit and play with him beforehand, give him toys to play with, books to look at, etc, he will cry if I put him down. He takes forever to go to sleep at night so I end up with about an hour to myself where I manage to fold the huge pile of clothes then I just collapse into bed out of sheer exhaustion, I have no time for myself and I keep stress eating which means I have put on weight, have really bad skin and feel awful about myself. He still isn't sleeping through the night and wakes up for milk then refuses to sleep again which has got me into the habit of just putting him in our bed because he will sleep that way. He wakes so early too. I am working, so very often I go to work on about 4 hours sleep. My husband is great when he is home but he works crazy shifts at the moment to try and help us over Christmas. But still financially we are completely broke. Nursery is taking all we have, including debts we accumulated whilst I was on maternity leave and my husband lost his job. We can't afford to do anything on the weekends and are stuck in when my husband works because I don't drive and we're not close to many things. I barely get to spend any 1-1 time with my oldest who is 7 because he cries, I feel so guilty and I miss time with just her. We are stuck in a tiny home because we aren't high on the list for a council house and the private properties want a guarantor which we don't have. Basically, I am the most miserable I have ever been in my life and I feel so guilty for feeling this way because it's not his fault. I would just love some advice, anything please.

Hey 👋 my DS was like this he was also my second, unfortunately i had to do some tough love, it ment a few days-week of constantly taking him back into the living room and putting him down with his toys and going back to what i was doing, he eventually lengthened his attention span to toys around him till he was able to play by himself long enough for me to do dishes/hoover/do laundry etc, it means alot of crying and back n forth for a few days but it worked xx

Hi my son was an extremely clingy child. I didn't work but was exhausted as I couldn't put him down all day and night. I had the play thing too but what I ended up doing is sitting with him and each play time moving a little away from him at around 10 months. So putting him on the floor a few times and reassuring him your still here, then shuffling away after he was comfortable with each distance. It was a gradual process but it worked to the point I could go into the kitchen for short periods of time and leave him in the living room. He wouldn't sit with anyone else either. I had him with me in my bed at 6 months as I was at my wits end. I type this as I am putting him in his own bed at 3 yrs old for the first time after cosleeping, he may not be going to sleep but at least he's not screaming blue murder either.
My point is it will get better. In a couple of years you will look back fondly at the memories of him driving you crazy. If you have someone you trust maybe leave him with them so you can have some time to yourself for a couple of hours or some time with your daughter. It would make a huge difference to you and how you feel.