3yo slapping!

[TenLittleLadybirds]

Our son has just turned 3 and is currently awaiting an autism assessment as referred by nursery for things such as rigid behaviour and pushing other children when excited. I imagine it will be a good year or two (or more!) before assessment. I only say this to avoid drip feed!

anyway, he has always been boisterous but the last two days have shocked me. At a toddler group yesterday him and another child wanted the same toy resulting in my son slapping the other child in the face!! I immediately told my son to apologise, I apologised to both the child and his mum and I removed him from the group , going home and having no dessert etc. I explained why it was wrong.

This morning I had a call from nursery to say he slapped another child “from over excitement”

I’m embarrassed, I feel sorry for the children and their parents. The slapping seems worse than the previous behaviour of pushing.

Any advice or personal experiences of this?

Please don't use food as a punishment. He won't equate not being allowed desert with him hitting the child. And it isn't going to stop him hitting someone again.
I think his issue is impulse control. It sounds as though he lashes out without thinking which isn't uncommon with three year olds anyway and especially children with autism ADHD.
Can you work with him on that? Play games with him where he has to take turns, read books with him that fucus on emotions, encourage him to talk about how he feels.
If you are with him when he hits someone, Immediately remove him from the situation,tell him it's wrong, explain to him why you are leaving and why he can't hit other people. Try and get him to think about how he would feel if someone hit him. Ask him if he can think of any other ways he might have handled his emotions. Eg deep breaths, taking himself away from the situation etc.