Looking for some advice from you lovely lot. First time posting so be gentle.
my partner has been going through some family issues with his mum. She’s basically disowned him after a year of trying to help her. She was/is a hoarder and after ending up in hospital, social services decided to move her to our town (50 miles from her). The plan was for her always to move but she was never very proactive about it. Anyway the choice was made for her and we were tasked with sorting her stuff.
it was a load of junk but we kept important things like photos and keepsakes etc. the rest was all mouldy and in cardboard boxes that had been lying that long they dissolved. Fast forward to her being in her new place and she’s threatened to sue us for getting rid of her things. I went to see her one day and she said she has disowned her son, she doesn’t want anything to do with him.
i never passed on the full message, no one wants to hear they’re own mother has disowned them.
they had a volatile relationship anyway before that and some of the stories he had told me honestly breaks your heart.
Knowing how his childhood was I’ve been very understanding and sympathetic to him. He has a short fuse and sometimes blows up over nothing but I figured he’s never really been in a stable family environment.
we have been together 20 years and have a 12 year old son.
we also run a business together so are together most of the time.
My issue at the moment is his temper is getting worse and his fuse shorter. We have had a few arguments recently that were beyond the normal scope.
our son and him seem to wind each other up and I’m constantly in the middle trying to be the peace keeper.
i know my partner is depressed and really needs to speak to someone but when I say to him he just says he will be fine and don’t worry. It’s not him I’m worrying about anymore though, I’m genuinely scared they are going to come to blows.
My son said to me last night he doesn’t want to live with him anymore and can we just leave and live on our own. It’s genuinely breaking my heart.
my partner knows what it’s like to live with a parent who is moody, volatile and unreasonable and he’s making the same mistake. Dont get me wrong my son is no angel in all of this and I have spoke to him but at the end of the day he’s the child. He shouldn’t be worried about his dad locking him out the house and shouting and swearing at him.
I don’t want to leave my partner and blow up my family but I also don’t want to live in a house that’s on edge constantly.
Help!!