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Parenting

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Original poster

What age are you allowed to leave dc's unattended at home

25 replies

cruisemum1 · 27/04/2008 15:29

My dd is 10 and very responsible. However, she has asked several times if she can stay at home while I pop to the shops etc. (a five minute walkaway). I am not sure what the ruling on this is. There seems to be no restiction on the age for letting them go out unattended but I am sure there is one for leaving them alone. Also, what age can she look after her little brother (19mths). Not in a hurry to let her do this but might as well ask while I am on the subject!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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LIZS · 27/04/2008 15:30

There is no fixed "rule" . If something unfortunate happened you could theoretically be accused of child neglect even up to 16

scanner · 27/04/2008 15:31

I don't think there is a law about this, fwiw I've recently started leaving dd1 at home while I take dd2 to a school club, it's a 10 min round trip. DD1 is 8 and v responsible type, she knows not to open the door or answer the phone and has my mobile number.

belgo · 27/04/2008 15:31

I don't think that there is a specific age when it is legal to leave a child unattended.

It sounds perfectly reasonable to me to leave a sensible 10 year old alone for a short while while you go to the shops.

But as for her looking after her baby brother - I think she has to be at least 14 to officialy babysit?

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scanner · 27/04/2008 15:32

I know of a local family where the mother takes the father to the train station 15mins leaving four children aged between 8 - 4. I certainly wouldn't do that.

Original poster

cruisemum1 · 27/04/2008 15:43

Thanks for postings. I was certain there was a law about it but from what you say there is not. That makes more sense I guess being that you can leave a 9 year old to walk to school by themselves! Would you let your 10 yo go to the shops by themselves then? She keeps asking to go but it petrifies me!

OP posts:

Original poster

cruisemum1 · 27/04/2008 15:43

Scanner - that is ing!

OP posts:

redwino · 27/04/2008 15:46

Quite interesting article here

bellavita · 27/04/2008 15:51

Both my nearly 11 year old and 8 year old go to the shop. DS1 has been going for about a year now and DS2 a couple of months.

I have just started to leave DS1 when I nip out - most is about an hour when I have gone to the park with DS2, but he does have my mobile number.

I would not leave DS1 and DS2 in the house together and I would not leave DS2 in the house by himself - he would probably end up blowing it up!

DoubleBluff · 27/04/2008 15:54

There is no upper/ lower age limit in law.
You have to decide what is acceptable.
A child under 16 can look after a younger child, but if anything were to happen to the other child, the older child could not be held legally responsible, you as the adult would be.
A ten yr old i would say could be left for a short period of time, ie less than an hour, but not left to look after a younger sibling.

narkymum · 27/04/2008 18:40

I know someone who leaves her 13, 12, and 6 year old all day while she goes to work (school hols) she does not need to work she does it to get away from her dss. They are v aggressive kids and it has bothered me for some time if I was to report she would know it was me

scanner · 27/04/2008 23:13

narkymum, I can see why you are torn. I'd worry for the 6 year old, in fact all of them.

RosaLuxembourg · 28/04/2008 00:18

I allow my 10 year old to:
Go to the shop to get milk etc
Go swimming with her friend - about a mile walk away but no busy roads to cross.
Go to the cinema with her friends (also about a mile away)
Walk to her friends' houses alone.
Stay home alone for up to an hour.

I do NOT allow her to
Stay home with her younger sisters to look after.

I want to encourage her independence and allow her to do things for herself, but I don't think it is fair to put her in a position of responsibility for her siblings.

twentypence · 28/04/2008 04:50

In NZ it's 14 to be left home alone, the babysitting age is also 14.

PussinWellies · 28/04/2008 11:10

I have just started to leave my nearly-10 year old while I'm going somewhere very local and when there are neghbours around.

Must admit he had to push quite hard for this one, even though I've let him walk to school and to the local shop for a while. My feeling is that if HE had an accident walking down the street, someone would recognise him and tell me. If I had the accident further away, how and when would he find out?

I leave my 12-yr-old for slightly longer periods and when I'm further away, now that he can reliably use the phone.

I still forbid cookery, woodwork, naked flames and friends to visit when I'm not there.

PussinWellies · 28/04/2008 11:11

Should perhaps make it clear that that was naked flames only... not naked friends. Though I possibly should ban those too.

christywhisty · 28/04/2008 20:22

I leave my 10 yr old DD at home for short times under an hour.She goes to school by herself and plays out in our cul de sac every day.

Very sensible DS is 12 goes to school by train, I have left him by himself while I am at work between 9 and 3.

TallulahToo · 28/04/2008 20:41

Not sure if this is just a local council thing but here goes....

My DS's school advise the following and my own sister who works in another primary school has just been on a training course which included this subject - so hopefully this is right.

No minimum age AT ALL (shock!) Any child can be left home BUT parent will be held responsible if anything goes wrong AND must be able to demonstrate that they took all reasonable precautions, e.g. a fire guard must be fitted for all under 12's. AND for babysitting under 16's are not allowed to be paid for sitting unless it is for a family member (not sure if this is siblings only or not).

If in doubt, sugest you check with your school or council as they are the ones likely to act on any wrongdoings.

VoluptuaGoodshag · 28/04/2008 20:44

Don't you think it's odd that it's perfectly acceptable for a child of 10 to venture out alone to school but it's not OK for them to be left alone in an environment that is most familiar to them and safer in relative terms (i.e. compared to busy roads, nuuters, bullies)!

RosaLuxembourg · 28/04/2008 21:23

Tallulah - you are correct about the no minimum age thing - it is up to the parent to make that judgement for themselves. I don't know where the not being allowed to pay an under-16 to babysit thing comes from though, there is no legal basis for it as far as I know. Lots of 14 and 15 year olds I know babysit.

seeker · 28/04/2008 21:28

My 12 year old does all that Rosa's does and more - and I alos leave her at home for up to about an hour with her 7 year old brother. But he is very sensible and they get on very well - I don't think I would if the relationship was at all problematic.

RosaLuxembourg · 28/04/2008 21:31

Seeker, I would probably leave DD1 alone with DD2 who is a v v sensible 8-year-old but DD3 is a horse of a very different colour. I think poor DD1 would be hiding in a wardrobe gibbering after five minutes of supervision the human tornado.

KaSo · 28/04/2008 21:32

I left my DS1 from the age of 10 working up to now where we'll happily leave him for a whole day. He's 13 and now I leave him with his siblings for short periods of under an hour during the day, but at 7 and 9 they aren't babies who need any kind of care of much supervision.
He'll babysit at night when he's 14.

mrspnut · 28/04/2008 21:38

Tallulah - there is no legal basis for the non payment of babysitters under the age of 16, nor for fitting a fireguard for children under the age of 12.

I suspect that the head of education social work has been a bit over zealous in drawing up the child protection training documents.

As a social worker, I wouldn't expect a family to have a fire guard if they didn't have a baby or toddler. Once a child is old enough to remember that the fire is dangerous then you don't need one.

FairyMum · 28/04/2008 21:43

I have left DD (now 9) alone since she was 7 for a few hours, but we live next door to friends and have joined up living-room with them and share garden so sort of one house and only leave her when they are at home so I suppose its a bit different to leaving her all alone. However, would not leave my 6 year-old ds1 for a few years yet. I think it depends on the child and if the child is happy being left.

seeker · 28/04/2008 21:44

You're right. Rosa - it depends on the children. My ds is very sensible - and also hero worships his big sister - if he was any feistier I wouldn't expect her to look after him! (not if I wanted either of them to survive the experience.....)

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