HELP my toddler is so difficult!!!!!

[Helena1993]

My 2 1/2 year old is SO difficult when she doesn't get her way. O M G.

She whines and whines for 10-30 minutes.Shee says: "I want food" I give her food. She doesn't want it. "Want toast with cream cheese." Then I make toast with cream cheese. She doesn't want that either. "Want toast with jam!!" At that point I just told her no.
She kept whining and whining and whining. I'm starting to lose my mind over her behavior. Earlier today she hit me in the face with one of her toys and made my lip bleed. It still hurts. Yesterday she hit me in the face and started laughing. What the hell happened to my cute baby?
I wish i could say that I like spending time with her, but I DON'T.

I think you'd have to be insane to enjoy spending time with a 2 and a half year old. Luckily for you, she's nearly 3. And one day she'll be 4 and a wonderful human being 😂

That comment is really helpful. Thank you... is 3 already easier than 2 1/2?

My son is 2 and a half. Sounds very similar.

Hitting you is not OK. I really tell my son off if he does that. They have to know it's not ok. I put him in time outs for that.

Stay strong !

I put mine in time out too. It's good to know this is really a normal phase. Wow... how do ppl have 2....

Yes!

I have a nearly 5 year old girl too and she was horrible at 2 and a half ! It started begging better after she turned 3. It's not uncommon.

There are toddlers who are more chilled, but a lot of them are quite spirited.

I do think you need to be firmer with her - all these "I wants" to which you instantly capitulate!

2 year olds are very challenging, but they need boundaries to learn proper behaviour. Giving in is not the way.

Op I have a nearly 2 year old and nearly 3 year old and they are not the same as your little girl. The constant moaning for good but never happy enough, it will pass just be calm and consistent and if you've given and option then that's what they get. Learn to zone out

My second was awful basically. Then the month before her 3rd birthday she vastly improved. She's nearly 4 and honestly isn't that bad. I'm anticipating that by the time she turns 4 she'll be quite reasonable. I can't wait.

Hmm, mine were fine at two but horrors at three and four. It's very variable. That's why there's terrible two, threenagers and fucking fours!

No more advice just solidarity here op. I have the loveliest 3 year old you could imagine. She’s funny, loves to play, is so interested and enthusiastic about life! She has her moments of being whiny and difficult but we can reason with her a bit and overall she’s a joy. This time last year I could have cheerfully dropped her off on the side of the road and not looked back. She’s my 3rd and her oldest sibling was much easier so don’t lose all hope! My middle was quite emotional for a while so challenging in a different way but that seems to have passed too. Keep going and do whatever you can to give yourself some peace / space / respite!

No, every stage is a different challenge all the way up to 18 and beyond. People just have different opinions of which stage is the worst, they're all bad in different ways (and obviously different kids are different too).

Sounds like mine, it was a horrible time. My friend said to me “if anyone else treated you this way you wouldn’t like them either” which helped with my guilt of not enjoying time with her.

shes just turned 3 and it’s getting easier, but it felt like it lasted forever. One thing that helped was naming the want when I was saying no e.g. “I can hear you want a new sandwich, and I can’t make that for you right now” or “you’re cross I’m not making you a new sandwich, I would be too! And i don’t want to waste food so this is what you have”. Sounds faffy but it did actually diffuse the whining

I would say.. take a breathe... don't take it too seriously.... dial your inner emergency dial down by say 50%, only responsive to actual emergencies... plug your ears, or have a nice happy tune going in your head....
"aww poor baby wanna jam but there no jammm... oh you're so cute"
Basically, detach yourself emotionally. Think: fairytale mum. They seem a bit ditsy - because THEY HAVE TO BE.

Meanwhile, this mental detachment gives you the headspace to work on their behaviour. You're there to teach. Tell her whining (too much) is not ok. Hitting is NEVER ok. Then hopefully, after much to and fro, the result will be a child you actually like being around with.

I'm in a similar boat OP only mine has only just turned 2. Reading the advice on this thread with interest.

You're not alone and you're doing great. X

It is such hard work isn't it!

Mine is a similar age and the constant whining / fussing is exhausting. This morning it was fussing about who would move his toy cars, where he was going to sit at the table, there was too much mango in his smoothie... then faffing about which book to read on the toilet / while brushing teeth, then not wanting to wear a jumper/coat, then refusing to put his bike helmet on despite wanting to go to nursery on the bike.

It's endless!

My 21 month old is starting this... the only thing that helps is to get out of the house for as much of the day as I can

My little girl is 2y 8m and the last 8m have been horrendous. I had decided I didn't want anymore children because it was so stressful and I just didn't enjoy parenting. HOWEVER, in the last 3 weeks we seemed to have really turned a corner and my time with her is so wonderful now.

I read 'there's not such thing as naughty' by Kate Silverton and 'Toddler Calm' by Sarah Ockwell Smith and they both really really helped me.

There is so much going on in their little brains at the age - language development, emotions, relationship, meeting new people etc and I think they are so easily overwhelmed. I can be foul to my husband after a busy day so I think they are just going through the same. It doesn't make it any easier though and I'm sending you a big hug. It will pass - I promise! And when they are teenagers and storm out the house on an argument we will wish they were 2 again!! xxxx

The title of the naughty book sounds interesting! Thank you for your comment xxx

I think that's abit harsh....
2 year olds can be hard work, yes, but is also a really sweet time where their little personalities and relationships really start to develop.

Mine was an absolute dick up until the age of about 4 and then he became far more reasonable and likeable!

Hang in there. It will get better.

I should add he's now 10 and awesome!