8 week bedtime routine

[Mags1993]

Hi, first time Mum here :) at what age did you start getting your baby into a nighttime routine? I have an 8 week old and at the moment we are feeding on demand and letting baby sleep as and when he wants as well (sometimes contact naps, sometimes in his bassinet). He doesnt sleep through the night yet as usually wakes every 3 hours. We usually give him a bath and bottle before we have our tea and then he contact naps on DP or I for majority the of the evening whilst we are downstairs watching TV. This allows DP (who is at work all day) to have some quality contact time with our baby. We go upstairs whenever we want to go to bed (usually about 10pm) and do a final feed and cuddles before putting him down in his crib. I have seen other posts where people are doing bath/bottle/bed at 6:30/7pm but I don't understand how to do this when the NHS advice is to let them sleep in the same room as you for the first 6 months. Unless people are also going to bed when they put their baby down, which would give us no evening as a couple. Advice needed please :)

You're doing absolutely fine and exactly what I did with my two. It worked for us. If it's working for you, keep doing it.

My daughter has just turned 7 months old now but we didn’t start a proper bedtime routine until she was about 12 weeks old. All the books & guidance says 12 weeks is a good time to start as at that age they can actually start to get into routines and learn them, they have their day & night correct etc. From about 12 weeks we have done bath at 7ish, then bottle and bed so she typically falls asleep 7:45-8ish. I pop her down in her next to me crib and have always just gone up to bed with her. When she was 0-12ish weeks she would just sleep on us downstairs but after that we did want a routine of going down in her crib so I go up to bed with her and just read my book or go on my phone.

It means though that now she’s 7 months we’re able to stick to the routine she now knows and has and I can come downstairs once she’s asleep with the baby monitor on so we get a bit of an evening back again just us 2.

There’s no right or wrong. The logic with doing it the way we did is that she’s now used to bath, bottle, bed, in the crib, so now she’s old enough to be there alone we have our evening back. If we’d stuck with wanting our evening this whole time then she’d still be downstairs with us, or we’d have to change the routine she’s used to to suddenly go into her crib while we go downstairs which might have been more hassle long term.

You are right, you shouldn't let them sleep alone until after 6 months. We did the same as you until 6 months! Enjoy all the lovely snuggly cuddles on the sofa :)

Carry on as you are

From around 3/4 months they kind of wake up and then it can be hard having the tv on and keeping them downstairs, at least it did for me. I bought some wireless earphones and would go to bed with her, watch stuff on my iPad or listen to podcasts/audiobooks

There will probably be many many times during your journey as a parent where you won't have time alone with your partner

Isn't that just the reality of parenting?

We didn't start a bedtime routine with either of our 2 until about 5/ 6 months. They both slept on us until we went to bed and then at 7 months both started sleeping through in their own rooms. You're in the thick of it atm but it does get easier and just do what you need to do. Try to ignore what others are doing (easier said than done, I know) and just do what works for you. You're doing great

Do whatever works for you! But we did the 6.30pm bath and 7pm bedtime by putting them to bed in the moses basket in a dimly lit corner of the living room. Then feed at 10ish and carried upstairs to bed. So it can be done whilst still following safe sleep guidelines.