Can’t go on like this

[Amumthatcantgoon]

I am on edge constantly. 2DC.

DC6 &DC4.

DC4 is challenging (polite) to say the least. Won’t sleep, won’t get dressed. Nothing we ask at all.

its 10pm most nights before they’re asleep and then they wake in the night and get in our bed disturbing us all

mornings are a huge fight - so is anything that doesn’t go their way (tantrums so bad I think from over tiredness)
DC6 mostly quite good but does come and wake us any time between 5-6am. So a maximum of 7 hrs broken sleep but I can’t even get to sleep at 10pm when DC4 eventually drifts off after the stress of trying to even get them to sleep!!

no down time at all and wake ups in the night just to be met with tantrums throughout the day.

its seriously effecting my mental health now. Please help? It gets better right?

I can absolutely recommend this book.... 'The Parenting Puzzle: Your Guide to Transforming Family Life Paperback – 1 May 2003
by Candida Hunt (Author)'

There are also courses.

It really helps you to work on the best ways to do things, as a parent. The other resource I would recommend is 'How to Talk so Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk' Paperback – 14 July 2022
by Adele Faber (Author), Elaine Mazlish (Author)

I know it can be very tough and reading books may seem like an added chore but these are so easy to read (i am dyslexic) and so i hope they help.

What is DC4 night time routine, how would they like to sleep?

I'd seriously go to bed with them, double bed in their room or a mattress on the floor. With both of you getting more sleep shorter you may then have the energy to look at making changes.

One of my DC needed very little sleep. I had her treated for retained Moro reflex which improved things significantly.

"It gets better right?"

It generally does. Things change.

I used to go to bed with mine. I was so tired I'd fall asleep reading a story and that encourages them to sleep. Put the bedroom light on a 15 minute dimmer/timer. Then at least you'll get an extra two hours sleep.

It curtails your grown-up evenings for a few months until they get into the routine, but it worked for me.

Can your DH sleep with the older one, and you with the younger?