Parenting Diploma - Module titles

[BellaBear]

How To Change a Nappy Using Only One Wipe

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'Structural Characteristics of Organic Composite Materials' or why you need to wipe up the Wheatabix before it sets

Communication skills workshops:
How to keep in touch with your DH/DP based on 5 minutes time together a day (awake and alone).
How to show your displeasure even when you want to laugh.

Gender studies :"Mummy, where's your willy?"

raising teenagers without turning to drink

Co-sleeping: A beginner's guide taught by a contortionist (sp?) from the same circus as the lion-tamer

custy youre back -good!!!

Foreign languages: Understanding your toddlers long, earnest and clearly very important pronouncements ( supporting literature also available in other languages, please contact admin for details)

Co-sleeping: improvers (more than one child). An osteopath will be supporting this class

Kim and Aggie should do a class on how to effectively remove the puke/p*ss/poo from carpets/clothing and bedding...

How to repeat yourself ad infinitum without losing your mind.

"Put your pants on please. Put your pants on. Have you put your pants on yet? Put your pants on right now. PUT YOUR PANTS ON" And repeat for each item of clothing until dressed.

Tongue-biting for parents. Seminars available on:-
Not tutting at the parenting choices of others.
Not swearing inadvertantly whilst collecting child from nursery.
How to react when your potty training child craps on your carpet without giving them a complex(this seminar will also give credits on the "Kim & Aggie" module and the "Potty training by Freud" module)

tigana, you are good at this!

Either
Origami - folding real nappies
Or
Nappy changing - how to fold a disposable up really tightly without it undoing ang flinging poo everywhere

Credits transferable during the course

Extra credits for reeducating those who should know better - health workers, husbands, grandparents...

The socio-political implications of baby naming.

Textile Design: dressing a girl in non-pink (double credits to reflect difficulty)

Video maintenance: Duplo removal step by step.

Diplomacy at the school gate/shopping centre - how to tell people to p*ss off and leave off their judgy pants until their sprogs begin to kick off...

Risk Assessment toolkit:
Section 1 - Nutritional aspects of children's parties (veggie/vegan/gluten-free/sugar-free/organic)
Section 2 - Slips Trips Falls (soft play centre diagnostic)
Section 3 - Display Screen Equipment (how to MN with a toddler in tow)

Diplomacy course - sponsored, of course, by AIBU MN regulars - as to how to give someone else's DCs a ticking off without causing offence ...

Creative class - Best way of answering that awkward "why?" question

Diplomacy course - How best to deal with those glares of the public when your little darling asked in loud voice "MUMMY WHY IS THAT WO/MAN SO...?!"

"How to deal with the invisable monster/animal which your child likes/dislikes and says is under the table/bed" course