What's her title

[K85]

I have a question, me and my mam have had a huge argument resulting in my partner not wanting her to see our son. So long story short, me and my wife have been married 6 years come halloween. I gave birth to our son 4 years ago, now my mother during said argument mentioned the fact that my wife is not blood related to our son. And that she is his step mother. My question is, what is her title? I don't believe she's his step mother, she is his mother just as much as I am. We were married before he was conceived.

Oh I don’t blame your wife for not wanting contact with your mum. What an utterly disgusting thing to say. Hope you and your wife are ok. Ps she’s just mum as much as you

If you're two women married and both named on the birth certificate then legally she's also his mother but in the same way that an adoptive mother is. She's obviously not his blood relative, as she's not related by DNA. She's related by law and by the relationship she has with him as his other parent.

Yes, she’s his mum - I am surprised you would need to even ask that question. What an awful thing for your mum to say - deeply disrespectful to your family and homophobic.

Does it not bother you that your mother clearly has respect for your relationship?
She’s the child’s mother and your mother sounds deeply unsupportive.

My sister is married to a woman and they have a child together. Only one of them was physically able to carry that child. They are both Mothers. Not all Mothers carry a biological child. One is Mum the other is Mama.

To call your wife a step Mum is beyond disrespectful and crass. No wonder your wife is pissed, I am angry on her behalf.

In the nicest possible way, it’s not the same as an adoptive mother (which i agree is an equally valid parent).

OP’s partner was presumably part of the decision to bring the child into the world, was part of the story of his beginning, he would have heard her voice in utero, and she was there from his first breath until today, providing care and parenting.

I said it's the same legal relationship. Because it is. She's legally the mother but not biologically.

Her title is whatever you and your wife agree it should be. My ex-dp and I are both mothers to our children, Mummy and Mama. Most lesbian parents I know do the same.