Hi all.
First post - sorry, a long one.
I've been separated from my partner for nearly 6 years. We have a daughter and a son (11 and 9)
We split as he had an affair with my best friend and now they have 2 children together (1 planned when we were together)
Since then, I've paid the mortgage by myself (He was still on it) and retrained as a teacher, now making a good wage and life for the kids and I.
He has regularly paid £350-400/month for both children. He earns more than I know as we used to have the same role so I know this isn't what he should be paying.
He has been threatening before, threatening to keep the children, and telling me to move back home and be without the children.
They live with me 24/7, he sees them on a sunday and has probably had them overnight 20 times in 6 years.
I told him in febuary I wanted him off the mortgage and was going to try and remove him. He agreed, as he couldn't buy a new house still on it, but I couldn't manage it.
Since then I've sold the house ( it had £100k profit) he said he didn't want anything from it, but we agreed he'd take £20k, and the rest remains with me and the kids - I'd need to pay into my new partners mortgage for financial security.
Since then he has decided he wants £20k, me to put £40k into savings and be released from paying the £400/month. I said no it leaves me worse off (me being the kids) and he effectively gets off scott free.
He decided to make the sale a 50:50 split, so he took £50k, yes legally entitled to it, but morally awful as he only paid the mortgage for less than a year.
I want to put him on CSA as he has really financially abused the situation and effectively stole the security the kids and I have for the future.
I am really scared to put him on CSA in case he decides to 'keep' the children on the days they go with him - would be impossible as we live 45 min drive away so he'd be unable to get them to school etc..
But he underpays every month, and doesn't help out with anything with them at all.
No, I do not need this to live, but I want his contribution to go into a savings account, and this can be used to pay for opportunities for the children.
Am I being unreasonable? Any advice is welcome.