Staying in the same house to coparent with my cheating ex husband good or bad idea?

[heartbrokenn]

Right here goes trying to make a long story not so long...

I recently found out my husband has been having and affair with another women but it wasn’t romantic and she isn’t in the picture in anyway but anyway that’s not why am her we have two boys together 3 and 5 and the thought of not seeing them half the week is tearing me apart so my question is do you think it’s possible to tell him he can come back and stay in a different room and coparent in the same house? It would also be amazing financially! Part of me thinks this is a great idea and the other party thinks am bat shit crazy also he wouldn't be coming straight back it wove for another week or two as I can't have him near me yet as obviously am still going through the shock disgust and disappointment but if I can make this work for my boys I definitely would! What do you think?

Terrible idea. At some point one or both of you will want to move on. How do you navigate new girlfriends and boyfriends living under the same roof? Unfortunately you are either together as a household or you’re not, there is no in between. Trying to cohabit whilst not together (worse, actively hating each other) is confusing, heartbreaking and ultimately preventing you from healing. This is neither good for you nor the kids and all it does it kick the can of fully separating down the road to face at a later date. Likely with even more damage.

Honest answer?

I'd always recommend putting the children first.
Your OP is not doing that.
😞
But surely top priority has to be what is best for them. 🤷‍♀️

Depends on whether you can genuinely live as friends without any tension affecting the children?

@heartbrokenn terrible idea!

You'll end up sliding back into a wifey role while he's out shagging around and it will kill you inside. The resentment, frustration and anger will eat away at you.

Clean break - move on. Know your own worth and don't settle for anything less.

Remember, your kids will learn what a happy, healthy relationship is from you so show them independence and strength.

Terrible idea - how would you feel if he started dating someone else while living with you?
Will the financials and chores be evenly split or will you be responsible for a cheater?!?

Does he even want 50/50 ?

How long do you plan for this arrangement to last? It's a terrible idea anyway , if you go ahead and it doesn't work, you'll put the children through the trauma of him leaving again.