When did you feel yourself again?

[notgoingout123]

After having a baby how long did it take for you to feel yourself again ?

Honestly? I feel I fully got my life back when the youngest was 4. Everything became easier all round.

With both of my children, I think they were 3-4 months before I felt physically back to normal as well as getting back to normal life. I had friends who took longer.

Are you ok? How old is your baby?

With my first quite a while as lockdown compounded the issue. With my daughter... around now I think? She's 20 weeks and I'm just starting to look like myself again and fit into my old clothes etc.

What do you mean by "back to yourself'?

The second they were out I felt better then I had done for months etc tricky pregnancies. Healing wise from c section maybe a week or two but I was more mobile leaving hospital.

In terms of feeling like I could balance baby and life and being content with it, maybe a day. I was wearing heels, makeup, going out places, entertaining people at home within a few days. But I'm one of those people that was practically made for newborns. That stopped a few months later when they got more demanding and now I'm a make up free mum bun woman looking knackered and ragged.

In terms of life going back to how it was before -never. The child free version of me is gone. I'm used to it now. My social life died when the eldest was about 9m old and with the addition of a sibling, Covid and disability has never returned in the same way.

But I'm happy. Life is different but I'm different.

Yeah im fine, just have a difficult 5 month old! She doesn't settle with anyone other than me so it's a bit difficult as I find it hard to take a break but she is better than she used to be a 2 months ago!

Hoping she improves over the next couple of months as it's really draining!!

I think when both kids were passed the toddler stage. I started to do things for me - things I'd always enjoyed like going to gigs, having a day in London with friends etc. I was sleeping properly and just felt like me.

Yeah im fine, just have a difficult 5 month old! She doesn't settle with anyone other than me so it's a bit difficult as I find it hard to take a break but she is better than she used to be a 2 months ago!

Hoping she improves over the next couple of months as it's really draining!!

Hang in there, it definitely gets easier as they start to take more of an interest in the world, can be more easily distracted if you're not there so someone else can settle them, and once they're weaned in my experience.

It's good that things seem easier than a couple of months ago and I hope that continues. I have lots of friends who found the first year very intense. Some babies are harder than others, my second was harder than my first. Although it won't help you feel any less tired, I think it can sometimes help to know that a lot of parents, especially mums, feel the same when they're in the thick of it and it does get easier. 💐

When I went back to work, which was around 9-11 months both times. I loved being back to normal life again, being able to drink coffee and eat a meal in peace.

A couple months after going back to work so maybe 15 months.
I did feel a lot more me after stopping breastfeeding at 7 months

I noticed a definite change around 6 months. I didn’t feel freshly postpartum anymore (I had an open hole in my c section scar for 3 months, so my ‘fresh postpartum’ feeling lasted longer than most as I hadn’t healed!), and it started to feel like I was taking my mini best friend out to do things, rather than trying to manage a newborn. Don’t get me wrong, it was still hard, but I felt more like it was ‘normal’. She’s almost 15 months now, and although I’m not quite there it is definitely better. I don’t get as anxious. For me, I think it’s closely linked to my weight. I’ve lost 3 stone and I’ve got another 0.5 stone to lose before I’m back to pre-pregnancy weight. I’ve also got diastasis recti so I need to fix that. I think once my body is looking better, I will feel better. Shallow, but that’s the way I feel!

When DS started school and I actually had time for me.

Hes now 10.

I have DD who's 1 so kinda doing it all over again and looking fwd to having some me time back in a few years

I see it ever happening, but I'm in the toddler years and lovely as DC is, I'm not really ever doing anything I'd actually like to do.

*can't

After the first six months or so I was doing a lot better, but honestly I'd say I was properly back to normal when she went to preschool at 2 and I started to have a couple of hours to myself in the morning. Do you have the option of some regular time to yourself at all? X

No that's not shallow, I would be the same but thankfully I went back to my pre-pregnancy weight within 2 weeks postpartum.. but now that I've stopped breastfeeding I have put on 3 kg which is disheartening but will just control my diet more.. I hope you feel better all round VERY soon

That's good to know, it seems after 6 months things get a little easier from the responses. Yes I get a few breaks, half hour here and there as I live with my mum and siblings.. separated from husband so he's useless! Hoping I will feel better as she gets more settled over time