weeing on the toilet.......

[Lou2222]

Please can someone help me! I have ran out of ideas.
My DD is 3 years 9 months and is happy to wee on her potty but will NOT go on the toilet, she has a princess toilet seat and everything.
She is at school in the afternoons at the moment but is starting full time in September. She will not go to the toilet at school and simply goes on her potty before and after school. At night she is totally dry. She is currently missing out on school trips out and things as she will not be able to go to the toilet. I have tried everything I can think of including pretending I don't care about it, reward charts etc etc.
When I ask her why she doesn't want to use it she says because she doesn't want to be a big girl, I have told her over and over again that she is always going to be my little girl etc etc. She has a sister 2 and a brother 10 months. At the moment my plan is to try her again with a reward chart, in competition with her little sister.If that fails I think I am going to have to force the issue and just remove all potties, nappies etc and see what happens, what do you think???

Would totally removing the potty from the equasion be an option? Even if it meant a few intial accidents? I'm sure at her age, she'd hate the feeling of wet pants and it may work?

Thanks Loopy..Thats my plan, I am giving the reward chart till Saturday and then it is no more potty. She has the ability to hold her wee all day but she will need to go at some stage. I am just being cowardly I think, I just know there will be crying etc etc but I also know it has to be done, hopefully it won't cause any long term damage

I'm sure it won't, afterall, I can't remember my potty training days and have never met anyone that can!

I'm potty training DD (2.6) and whether or not it will traumatise her if I force the issue is always on my mind.

Yes, you don't remember potty days but the damage may be done anyway. Read about 'anal retentive' and 'anal expulsive' personalities.

Nobody remembers the first few months of their lives, either, but we are told cc traumatises babies and they go on to have trust issues.

I agree with loopylena, DD2 only used to poo in the potty and wouldn't use the loo, but would for a wee. It worked out in the end (can't remember what we did - not helpful I know) but if there's no potty then she'll have no alternative. Perhaps don't take her to the loo before nursery and may be she will have to go at school.

If you do send her to nursery without letting her have a wee first, you best send some clean pants and bits just incase!!!!

Thanks everyone...She has never wet herself so I think it will upset her but needs must I think . I will talk to the teacher at school as well when I pick her up this afternoon and see how she can help.....

Good luck with it.