Painfully shy 20 month old

[Lefmry]

Hi everyone, has anybody else ever had a toddler that’s painfully shy before? If so did they ever grow out of it?

I know it could just be his personality as he’s been like it since he was at least 8/9 months old but it’s like really intense at times and dare I say it a little embarrassing?

He will cry even around family members if they look or try to talk to him, is very, very clingy in situations and has to be picked up. If he’s not crying he will make angry noises and shake his head saying ‘no no no’ if anybody does try to interact with him.

I find it frustrating because he’s a lovely little chatty thing at home and I feel like nobody gets to see that side of him because of how shy he is! 😩 Me and my partner do all we can to help bring him out of it, I arrange play dates with friends/family members with children at least once or twice during the week, he goes to soft plays, visits families houses on the weekends etc.

I don’t like forcing him in to situations he’s clearly uncomfortable in but felt it’s important to still see people as often as possible without pushing him. Does anybody have any advice?

It’s totally fine. It’s very normal at this stage and they really don’t start playing with other children or interacting much until about 3. He should be ‘shy’ and mostly want you because you are his safe place. Best thing you can do is reassure him and be there for him, not push him to do things that are overwhelming. That’s how he builds a sense of security and confidence about the world.

My eldest was quite timid and shy as a toddler, very clingy, would cry when other children got too close and too loud at the playground, didn’t leave my lap at groups and classes. She literally did not say a word if we visited family, completely mute then entire time. She is the most confident, outgoing, social butterfly now at 11. She bounds off into new situations and makes new friends easily. She’s just so confident and extroverted. I really wouldn’t worry about it. It’s all very normal.