My ex was involved with social services earlier this year.
In May it was closed. She now has a support worker.
The Young Person's Assessment acknowledges that my ex was out in the community taking cocaine and drinking.
She herself admitted to previously drinking daily but now only drinks on occasions or on a weekend.
She admits to 'dabbling' with cocaine, however, this is not a current issue and the children were never in her care.
She denies driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol, and denies the children ever being in her care.
Social Services advise that 'they have heard children getting into a car after people can be heard sniffing'
But they concluded that currently, there is no evidence to suggest that this is still occurring and the childrens needs are not being met.
On myself.. it says that i feel my concerns remain but i understand that there is a lack of evidence around this, and i cannot provide any evidence of ongoing issues either, so i am happy for the case to close to CSC.
The Stepdown plan states under the category.. What needs to happen?
That my ex needs to ensure that her and her partner are not both using substances at the same time if the children are present.
She needs to ensure that her parenting capacity is not affected, she is alert and still able to make safe decisions around the children.
If the above is not possible, She needs to ensure the children are being cared for by someone safe.
Under no circumstances should she be allowing the children to travel in a car with anyone driving under the influence of substances.
My issue is this.
There was never any alcohol or drug testing carried out.
Me and my ex partner have attended an MIAM about child arrangements, and we will be having our first session soon.
I have just been shown evidence that my ex and her partner have been ordering cocaine to her home.
I was shown the messages someone screenshot off a drug dealers phone.
I cannot use these for obvious reasons.. i wasnt sent them i was only shown them for those reasons.
They were only from the months July and August.
I know i can request a drug test in mediation.. but this is voluntary.
If this is declined, and im sure it will be..
Is it worth me taking it to court without actual evidence of it ongoing?
I know it for a fact but i cannot prove it without testing.
I have my child every weekend and now my ex is wanting weekends but this is when she is more likely to be using larger quantities and both her and her new partner are taking cocaine and drinking whilst caring for their children.
I do not believe this should be allowed where my ex then has our child in her care under these circumstances.
If i go to court there is a risk that no test will be taken and the days ive had with my child.. 3 days a week - thursday to sunday - and 4 during holidays - thursday to monday - could be reduced.. because arrangements would be taken out of our control and into the judges.
It really is a dilemma for me. i want our son to be in my care as often as possible but i work, my ex doesnt. Shes his main carer and a stay at home parent.
If she requests one weekend a month even, that is still not a situation i feel comfortable with. I do not want our son around this or the people she associates with who shares these activites.
its a nightmare situation for me and im struggling with knowing what to do.. how to go about trying to avoid this from happening and what possible outcomes might happen.
I need advice and i need it quickly. The first mediation session will be arranged this week and i have to try and work with my ex but i also must put our child first.
He is the priority here but how can i work with her but prioritise him if i feel that the two conflict.
HELP