Parents of schoolchildren

[hippopandamouse]

Not important in the slightest, it’s just really bugging me.

I naively thought that when I became a parent of a child attending school that the other parents would be mature adults and b*tchiness would be a thing of the past. Turns out I (at least in my case) was quite wrong 😂

We live in a rural village so I’ve grown up with some of these people or have known them throughout my lifetime in one way or another. Honestly soo many of them are horribly 2 faced and frankly quite vile! A friend of mine started attending the PTFA meetings, she is the only one who doesn’t drink so is perfectly aware of everything they’re saying - not much of it nice! They also don’t appear to have anything much nice to say about their so called “friends” when they aren’t around either 🫣

I worked in a very central part of this community for a long time and was forever getting all the latest gossip 🫣 and being told who really doesn’t like who etc, despite them all being very nice to their faces!

I was approached at a party by a man I used to know, he has a spoilt only child who always gets his own way. He put his hand on my shoulder and we had a real catch up. My DS (5) had waited patiently to have a go on a ride on toy and no sooner as he’s started scooting around he’s approached by this man to take it off him because his boy wants it. So I’m stood there holding my newborn baby trying to feed with two other children at this party one of which now in floods of tears. I couldn’t help but think what a d*ck.

Fast forward a few months and I really upset one of his best friends by (get this) liking her exs Facebook status! It was a general statement that I happened to agree with 😂 so I get a lengthy message explaining her disappointment in me (wtf?)

Anyway since this “incident” the above man now totally blanks me at school. Won’t step out of the way to let me get the pushchair past, doesn’t say thank you or encourage his kid to when we move out of their way on the pavement (sometimes me moving my pushchair onto the road - it’s not a busy place as such but not really the point)

We were late to the assembly last week so me and baby stood at the back, this lady and her pals were back row - they kept turning round to look at me. Baby wasn’t making a fuss or any noise at all so not really sure what I’ve done now.

Over the weekend my partner cut up the above man at the petrol station and naturally he gave an angry beep as his new girlfriend was in the car and she was probably incredibly impressed with his masculinity. Don’t think he anticipated my partners reaction at all 😂 he also gave an angry beep and shouted some obscenities at him 🤦‍♀️ (he was in a foul mood!) and no I don’t think this was an appropriate reaction as he was in the wrong!

My OH has no idea that he’s a parent from school and frankly wouldn’t care either but I’ve been thinking about my next encounter with him and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if I get a mouthful. It’s making me really anxious. Do I just tell him to grow up and speak to the actual driver if he has an issue?

I know it’s silly and not worth worrying about but I feel like I’m b*tched about quite a lot down there and it’s making me really uncomfortable. I used to love the school but it’s really changed and not for the better.

For context this man is really full of himself and a serial cheater. His ex wife’s mum even knew he was having an affair and didn’t tell her daughter!! Wtf?!

This place feels so messed up.

Sorry for the rant 😂 like I say - not important at all just nice to vent!

Yeah sounds like a messed up place, I’d consider moving and starting again! Or less drastic action would involve leaving social media or at least unfriending all these people, drop your children to and from school without engaging in the drama from the parents at all and try and broaden your horizons by doing things and meeting people outside the immediate area you live in, or talk to some of the newcomers to your area instead of these awful people you’ve been stuck with all your life.

Our village school is similar.. We don't live there thankfully. One frankly awful woman who lives in the village and drives to school thinks it's HER village I am certain... She owns the biggest house yet school actually voiced loudly all dc were to take £2 each in as their df needed an operation!! We declined and came to realise the head is as equally batshit to agree to such a collection! Ds was upset I refused his ask for the 2 quid. I did suggest maybe they could sell a vehicle or 2 to cover the surgery instead.

Honestly I’m very much at that point and the one thing keeping me here for now is our mortgage - it’s very unusual and we would never get another like it. I have family here too but unfortunately some of them behave in a similar manner - I overheard it myself and so did my daughter so it’s not just hearsay sadly.

Funnily enough I’ve been considering deactivating social media a lot lately! I used to share a lot in terms of updates and kids photos etc but I’ve stopped over the last couple of years as I figure a lot of them don’t need to know about my family anyway. Social media is another strange one - all the families competing over the best holidays etc 😂

I wonder if it’s a village school thing?! Oh we definitely have similar characters here too! I can’t believe they’d ask for a donation for such a thing! 🤦‍♀️ I would have done the same and not sent the kids with the money! Cheek of it 😂 I do wonder what on earth goes through these people’s heads!

Is it quite a small village school?

Characters like that have more impact in smaller schools because you have less other people diluting them.

I worked in schools for 20 odd years and you get parents like that in every school. Usually a similar number in most schools. It's just that when the school only has 70 pupils they stand out far more than in a school with 250 pupils and corresponding numbers of parents.

I live in a village and my dc go to a village school and we definitely don’t have this sort of drama. I don’t really get involved with school mums, other than a few that are friends already. I think it’s the same advice I give my dc in secondary school, just stay in your lane, keep yourself out of the drama, I don’t get involved in the gossip because I don’t involve myself in it.

Yes it is, around 100 kids total so like you say they aren’t very well diluted haha! I had my suspicions it may be the same across the board sadly. Such a pity as it used to be a lovely place to be, I’ve spoken to a couple of the other mums that I’m friendly with and they have said the same thing. Kids are happy though so that’s the main thing! ☺️

I’m glad you don’t experience this nonsense ☺️ I wholeheartedly agree with what you’re saying and I actually live by this mindset now (not that I’ve ever been in the thick of the drama) but I smile and say hello to everyone and stand alone in the playground or at the gates and if someone wants a chat they can come to me now. The behaviour of some of them is just so pathetic and it puts a dampener on things sadly.

I deleted social media a couple of years ago, honestly the best thing I’ve ever done. I have actually rejoined Facebook recently but with no pictures and no friends, it’s just so I can join all the local groups and keep up with what’s going on but in a detached way. Honestly do it, you won’t regret it.