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Original poster

DD is 16 months - too young to appologise?

12 replies

padboz · 21/04/2008 13:05

If I say 'can you say tree/car/hat' etc etc she will say it willingly and instantly - I therefore have no doubt that she knows what is being asked of her. She can say the word sorry and has done many times - normally when her sister has had to say it to her. If she hurts dd1 I would like to get her to say sorry but SHE WILL NOT DO IT She says 'NO!' If I ask her to say sorry and runs away. I tried for half an hour yesterday to get her to say it and in the end had to accept her kissing her sister as an appology. Should I persevere or wait a few months? I feel like I'm storing up all kinds of problems here and don't know if I'm being too harsh or not harsh enough.

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SydneyB · 21/04/2008 13:07

Blimey, your DD sounds very advanced to me! Not sure they can really understand meaning of sorry at that age, can they?

belgo · 21/04/2008 13:07

Always tell her to say sorry but don't push it at this age. 16 months is very young to understand the concept.

A kiss as an apology is good enough- very good in fact.

Kewcumber · 21/04/2008 13:07

do you want her to say it or mean it? I doubt she's capable of meaning it at 16 months but not much experience of it.

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notnowbernard · 21/04/2008 13:08

I think it's more the gesture that counts at that age...

So would go more for a "Say sorry, DD" but do a stroke/pat/kiss thing instead of the word itself

That way she'll maybe still get the meaning of what she's doing?

GrrrlInterrupted · 21/04/2008 13:08

Hello!

DS1 can't say sorry, but he understands the concept- he will stroke the head of the person he's saying 'sorry' to show he's sorry. He's 22mths now though, so bit older.

Thing is, tree/car etc are tangible things she can see, sorry is a concept she might not really understand yet, so perhaps she gets confused.

fluffyanimal · 21/04/2008 13:08

I think at that age it's better to settle for her being nice to her sister again. A kiss sounds like a very good apology to me. She's too young to understand about her sister's feelings anyway. She'll get the hang of it eventually so I'd probably not make a battle out of it.

Kewcumber · 21/04/2008 13:08

should add - tree/hat etc are things she can see and understand "sorry" is a very abstract concept for that age.

oregonianabroad · 21/04/2008 13:08

I'd say something like, 'I think you should say sorry' and then let it go.

Bky · 21/04/2008 13:09

My DD who has just turned 19 months wouldn't have a clue about apologising and saying sorry at the moment. She is not much of a talker but understands most things we say but I know she would not understand the concept of saying sorry to someone.

Indith · 21/04/2008 13:09

since my 15 and a bit month old can say hello, yes and uhoh I'd say a proper apology is a bit much to expect

Volkl · 21/04/2008 13:12

My DS is just 2yr and for the past few months when i;ve asked him to say sorry he's given me a hug (or said item) sometimes a kiss. He's just started to actually say the word Sorry.

Perahps you lo is just a little young yet, but i'd suggest encouraging her to cuddle or kiss instead for now

Original poster
padboz · 21/04/2008 13:14

sounds like a consensus She's a proper chatterbox and has a few 2 word things cracked - more milk, bath now etc so I'm reasonably sure of her language skills - shes said please and thankyou for a few months on the abstract front too. I think I'll back off tho - thanks

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