Ok to make 13 year old daughter clean the bathrooms?

[CourtyardDeniedFumble]

Hi, I just wanted to check if people think it's okay to make my 13 year old daughter clean our 2 bathrooms once a fortnight as it is pretty much only her and her friends that use them, and they have been getting much dirtier recently, not to mention that she probably should be learning to clean bathrooms by now anyway.

As for her other chores: she walks her dog and is responsible for picking up it's poo at home as well; cleans her room; empties the bins; do some of the dishes; and help hoover once a week. (Just in case this seems like I'm overworking her).

She has not been overly in favor of this change (They weren't overly pleasant to clean so I certainly am not going to miss doing it, and I get that she won't be thrilled to do it either), but I just wanted to check that this seems fine to all of you just in case I am being unreasonable.

How is it that it’s only her and her friends using the bathrooms? Do you never use the bathroom in your own house?

FWIW if you both had your own bathroom I wouldn’t think it was wrong that you both cleaned your own but I would expect a 13 year old to be made to clean up after you.

Cleaning a bathroom after two weeks is a big job. It might be more useful to teach her how to set it to rights after using it, or to give it a quick daily clean.

I was doing this at her age, seems fair. I did my parents ensuite and my older brother did the family bathroom.

Sounds normal to me, you don't want her to be one of those spoiled people who can't clean (I've lived with many). How many bathrooms do you have though??

Of course it's ok. You're not sending her down a coal mine, you're asking her to muck in with normal household tasks.

Seems fine, it was Ds1's job to clean the bathroom.

I think it's fine. The mess my teen sister leaves behind in the bathroom after just a weekend visit is crazy! Maybe encourage her doing 1 each week, if it's too much trouble for her then she will need to start policing her friends.

I’m sorry but is there some kind of ‘making my teenage daughter clean the bathroom fetish?’ Because this thread, this exact thread, is posted very often with the only thing different being the daughter is something 13 then 14 then 15 and then the thread is abandoned or deleted.

@Themapisupsidedown how grim if true. The fact that the OP has at a minimum three full bathrooms is pretty implausible 🤔

Here’s one from a few days ago https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/parenting/5165781-acceptable-chores-for-teen-girls?reply=138321122

There was one about. 15 year old being ‘made’ to clean the family bathroom and an en-suite a couple of days ago but it appears to be gone. It’s very odd that the same topic is coming up over and over again every few days.

It's fine but it's on you / others with parental responsibility to ensure she knows how to use the household chemicals safely, and clean the bathrooms efficiently, before she's expected to get on with it.

Set 1 bathroom as hers and have her keep it clean - for me this means more of a daily clean than every 2 week though!

Of course it is. Your teaching skills and responsibility

Yes of courses its appropriate

Is the 2 weekly routine becuase you clean them in between, so its cleaned every week and you want her to do every other week?

Or is it that you're setting a timescale of fortnightly cleans for the bathrooms she uses?

I would set it to weekly cleans to be honest

I take it these are en suites to her bedroom?

Well assuming you have a 3 or 4 bathroom house

I’d give her the option of using just one bathroom and I’d teach them supervise the cleaning for a while.
you’ll need to show her how and supervise or she’s going to wreck your taps with viakal or use meat bleach on the floor

beyond that it’s fine.
unless you have 2 other children who do nothing in the house then you know…it’s not fine

I think the list of her chores sound a lot. What is everyone else doing?

I think if doing the bathroom and the other chores then it’s a lot of chores to do.

I think she's doing more than her fair share tbh if she does both bathrooms. Dedicate one bathroom to her and she cleans that one. You clean the other one. But all pet care, hoovering, dishes and bathroom cleaning, plus keeping her room tidy seems a lot for a 13 year, and your giving her the worst jobs like poo picking and bathroom cleaning. I'd be more inclined to ask her to help sort laundry or cook a meal once a week than to expect bathroom cleaning tbh.

Remember, at 13, she's heading into her GCSE years, so the amount of time she need to spend studying is going to rise.

I'm a bit 😐 about kids doing shit loads of chores. Yes, they need to keep things clean and tidy and help around the house, but, they're still kids. I didn't have children for them to become my house cleaner. They'll have their whole life ahead to clean their own house.

I'm impressed that you've got her doing the jobs she does. Some tips on how you have done this would be great please!
And no, don't think it's unreasonable for her to clean up after herself in the bathroom but as suggested by PP, maybe teach her how to wipe sink after using, spray and rinse bath/shower after using, use toilet brush to keep on top of it rather than a full clean every 2 weeks.

Find it weird that she is the one person (and friends) using 2 bathrooms though? What do you use?

I would not feel ok being peed off she's messed a bathroom for me to clean...then expect her to clean mine aswell. I'd stick her or kids in 1 and expect her to keep it clean kf she is the main culprit. I only have 1. The OH cleans it and the daughter keeps it clean after use. Her room is where the magic happens with make up, hair, creams and lotions and that is down to her and has been for years (shes 17). Mine also does some dishes and laundry but she's studying hard for uni entry and that's enough for me

Maybe little and often rather than one big clean once a fortnight? A quick 10-15 minutes a day before bedtime or in the morning is probably more manageable.

I don't see why not.

I wouldn't expect her to clean a family bathroom

I would expect her (and everyone else over the age of 11) to spray and wipe down the shower, sink and bath after use if a mess was made.
Toilets are for the adults as the chemicals used are harsher.

Why is the bathroom such a mess though? Do you need additional storage or waste bins.

Absolutely fine. By 13 kids should be doing a few household tasks in return for pocket money IMO. Sets them up so much better for when they leave home & they’re often a bit more appreciative of how much you do when they have the odd bit of cleaning to do!!