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3 year old hates pants loves nappies

5 replies

FFSparenting · 16/09/2024 18:55

I've got a boy who is now 38 months and I've tried since aged 2 1/2 roughly to potty train about 3 or 4 attempts making no progress at all. Each time he starts off vaguely interested and I get maybe one wee in the potty and then he loses interest rapidly to the point of crying and asking for nappies and kicking the potty over. Got one poo in the potty about 2 months ago but I think that was a fluke, he seemed as surprised as I was!

Things we've tried:
Bribery - doesn't work due to his strong anti-pants stance.
Big boy talk - talking about the other children his age being in pants. He just says he like nappies, doesn't like pants. He seems to actively want to stay a baby if anything!
Loads of potty training books, Bluey, Aldi one, Bing, No More Nappies etc.

He does say when he is doing a wee in his nappy and seems to be able to hold in wees when he isn't wearing a nappy. I think he has formed an opinion that he isn't interested in anything to do with not wearing nappies and that's it.

I have been doing bare bum mornings recently with the potty available and he's been holding it in which suggests bladder control but then he starts asking for a nappy when he needs to go. I encourage the potty or toilet but he isn't interested and cries - should you stand your ground and say potty/toilet or nothing?

8 months on from the first attempt of potty training he is utterly uninterested and refuses even to try on pants for a short time, cries if I try to put them on. Says he like nappies and says he is 'scared of pants'. I think I have inadvertently overwhelmed him or he has just formed a stubborn opinion that potty training and pants are something he not interested in. I feel like I have totally messed up potty training and have no idea where to go from here. I am happy to book time off and crack this but with him being actively against the whole idea I don't know what to do.

Please someone give me some hope for a stubborn anti- pants boy! Or any ideas I will try anything at this stage so want him out of nappies.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Dal8257 · 16/09/2024 21:12

My dd was like this. She also used to make us put a nappy on her to do a wee, and then take it off straight afterwards. Such a waste! We did have to take the pressure off as it was making it worse, but left the potty and a comfy seat on the toilet and occasionally encouraged her to sit on it for a bit even if there was no wee. It took some months but she eventually started going in the toilet. I think she actually preferred the toilet to the potty. Can you just forget about it for a couple of months to take the pressure off and then try again?

shellyleppard · 16/09/2024 21:14

How about the pull up training pants? So he gets used to the feeling??

Underlig · 16/09/2024 21:21

Have you tried just lining the potty with a nappy?

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Raggydollz · 16/09/2024 21:25

I would leave it for a while, when they are really ready it falls into place

DCINightingale · 16/09/2024 21:41

Would it be possible for him to go commando for a while? DS absolutely refused to wear pants so he went commando for probably over a year. Then I bought him some more shorts style pants, called them shorts (still do) and he was happy to wear them. It might be a way of bypassing the pants stress to hopefully give more success with potty training?

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