Tips for potty training 21 month old DS

[BoringAF19]

DS is 21 months and I’m potty training this week and have planned 5 days at home but I’m not sure if he’s ready and need some tips.

For context DS is a fiddler and at every opportunity he’s got his hands in his nappy and has done since he was 3 months old. We put popper vests on him which stopped it for a while but he’s somehow managed to figure out a way to pull it out of the nappy with the vest on and dungarees over the top meaning he’s peeing all over himself 4 or 5 times a day and it’s an absolute nightmare! I am at my wits end with it if I’m honest.

His understanding is great but he doesn’t acknowledge if he’s peed or poo’d so I’m worried I’m starting too early but I need to do something. He is great with baby sign so thinking of using this to help with his understanding/communication for potty training.

I’m doing some reading on potty training this young and there seems to be a lot about regression later on, has anyone found this to be the case?

DD was 3 and decided one day she didn’t want a nappy and has been day and night trained since then so I’m totally out of my depth here.

any advice/pointers would be greatly appreciated ☺️ planning on starting on Wednesday

That does sound like a complete pain. I haven't done it that early though, DS was my youngest at just turned 2.

I would get the Oh Crap book. I've not trained mine that early due to wanting to do it in Summer but the author says from 20 months is a good age, even from 18 months with the right kid and more effort. I found it easier to train my second who was younger and had less understanding than her her sister did when I trained her. She was less resistant to the process. Five days at home sounds like a great start.

Well we’re off to a great start we got the big potty out and he tried to kick it over haha!

will definitely get the oh crap book ordered tonight to get started. I am really hoping he surprises me but my mum said she thinks the fiddling more often is a sign he’s ready and apparently myself and brother were potty trained by 2.

Personally I think 21 months is too young. He's fiddling because it's feels nice. My son did it and my daughter's hands are constantly finding their way during nappy changes. Let him explore his body at home in private. Obviously you'll have to be stricter in public because that's how the world works but I don't see potty training being a solution to his fiddling

@TeddyBeans I'm not looking for a solution to his fiddling it’s his body and he can fiddle if he wants. The issue is peeing on 4/5 outfits a day. Did you read my original post? Personally I believe the solution to peeing himself multiple times a day is potty training so that is my plan and was looking for tips. I don’t want this to turn in to a too young vs wait until their ready post because that’s not what this is about.

As well as the Oh Crap book you could go along to the library, they usually have a few different books in Potty Training that you can borrow.

Abc you can potty train your DC when you want, it's your DC

If anyone else comes across this thread just wanted to update. DS is now fully potty trained at home and this is what we done.

Day 1 - naked from the waist down and we had about 40 accidents because he was dribbling everywhere. We took him to the potty every 30 mins and when we caught a pee or poo we made a big fuss.

Day 2 - he started taking himself to the potty for a pee himself then shouting yay when he’d finished and got excited.

Day 3 - taking himself for a pee in the morning then after his nap I put pants on him and we had loads of accidents again as it confused him so moved to trousers and no pants. He would go to the potty and we’d help him take his trousers down and he goes.

Day 4 - we had a birthday party and he had 2 accidents there and didn’t want to use the carry potty or toilet. Came home and peed in his potty and we put the toilet ladders up which he loves to sit on but hasn’t peed/poo’d in the toilet yet.

Day 5 - 1 poo accident but no pee accidents then he actually poo’d in the potty himself last night we didn’t even realise.

Today he’s at nursery and is still in the baby room however he’s moving to the toddler room tomorrow where there’s toilets. The nursery have allowed me to take in his potty today as a 1 off but said because of infection control he won’t be allowed it from tomorrow and he’ll need to use the big kids toilets so I’m abit worried about that but he may surprise us.

for anyone thinking about it definitely give it a go but it is so tough I don’t know how many times I nearly gave up

That's great news. Well done!

The Oh Crap book has a chapter on nursery. It seems a bit unreasonable not to offer one or two year olds a potty whilst they are newly potty trained learning rather than just the toilet. If it's a small toilet he might like it though.

@AegonT im so proud of him he’s done amazing!

I actually wrote another thread on the nursery because of the issues we had yesterday with them but he done amazing and had 2 pees in the potty but they reminded me at pick up yesterday absolutely no potty even his own one we would provide so he’s to use the children’s (small) toilets. Today he absolutely refused to go on the toilets and screamed anytime they put him on. I’m off tomorrow so we’re going to try transition him to the toilets at home, feel abit sad actually that he’s not allowed a potty when he was doing amazing but it is what it is I suppose. They’ve never had a child potty train this young before and expect every child to go from nappy to toilet so don’t really have a policy for this.

Sorry your nursery isn't supportive enough. It was normal to potty train at this age in the past and I know a few people who have. Some kids need a little potty for a while before they will try the toilet and that's absolutely fine and normal.