ADHD girls

[Mamabear04]

Could you please share your experiences of what your girls with ADHD were like at 4-5 year old? How did they present?

Life and soul of the party. Funny, caring and busy. A real delight. She also had lots of hobbies (gym and dance) which helped use her energy. We didn't know she had ADHD until suspicions were raised in year 8 (12-13)

Did you notice any of the traits in hindsight?

Active, anxious, immature, disorganised, clingy, kind and clumsy. Has adhd and asc.

@FuzzyDiva could you expand a little more with examples?

Bad sleeper since birth (up every hour until at least 3 years), never napped after 18 months.
Has always loved showing off. Cannot sit at the table, stands for most meals. Needs instructions broken down, so "tidy your room" won't work but a list of what to tidy might (if something else isn't more interesting). Pretty bright but misses detail so may write a brilliant piece of work but missed what the question was because she rushes. Often feels very rude when talking with her because you will be talking and she will change the subject mid sentence to something she's just thought of that may have nothing to do with what you were saying. Very arty but will not be told what to do and rarely listens to feedback about how to improve.

Oh yes and clumsy! Cannot have a meal without at least one glass going over (I am not exaggerating).

My female ADHD family member at that age was very intense, unable to sit still, never able to eat very much, lots of sensory sensitivities, OCD and germ-phobia, very controlling of other people, interrupted people all the time, couldn’t tolerate people having a conversation that didn’t include her, no sense of risk or danger whatsoever. Low impulse control (running off, taking things that weren’t hers - including shoplifting, always trying to look at other children’s private parts). Not clumsy, but unable to notice if something or someone was in the way of what she was trying to do, so would just crash into people all the time. It was as though she couldn’t see anything but her objective.

I think she is also likely undiagnosed ASD. She has never had a friend, or seemed to want friends, and she’s now in her teens.

ETA: she was quite an extreme presentation, concerns were flagged in nursery around age 2 and she was diagnosed age 4 and began medication at age 6 which helped a lot. She is also incredibly bright.

Screaming at the slightest disappointment (e.g. we don't have pears, I did her hair wrong, friend played with someone else), wanting control (telling me and sibling what we were allowed to say during role play games). Claims she's the smartest in the class and is confident but in a very narrow set of groups and activities... painful lack of confidence and self esteem in most situations. Quite vain, and follows what's popular.

@Mamabear04 she was always the class clown and I think that now was a way of her not having the capacity to sit and do the work (although we have also found she is dyslexic). I always thought she was just 'busy' but see now it may have been something more. I honestly don't think I would have thought she had adhd though. Now she is the definition of it. I say if you looked it up in the dictionary her picture would be there. I think I excused her behaviour as she had other things going on (adopted child who also has sensory processing and attachment issues)

Incredibly academically gifted (which is probably a separate thing to the ADHD), more impulsive than most children, good sense of humour, very social, very interested in the world around her, very in depth knowledge of interest areas, maybe a bit more emotional than average, climbed anything and everything, very chatty, very affectionate but not overly so, had definite opinions on everything, had no problems with concentration (just to bust a stereotype), had been a terrible sleeper as a baby unless with us, and didn't like being put down. Just what comes to mind right off. Generally a very interesting child, a joy to have, but I felt I had to be a little more vigilant than most parents about potential impulsive moves.