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Original poster

Kids party - should I bother

21 replies

onthemovepasturesnew · 12/09/2024 18:48

DD just started school. Birthday is the end of September. We would love to give her a soft play 'big girl' party experience but neither she or I have managed to get to know any of the kids yet (or their parents) weather has been bad during most of the drop offs so far so kids have been ushered inside meaning I haven't had much of a chance to introduce myself to anyone. She's quite shy so doesn't seem to have gotten to know anyone yet.

The class is a 50/50 mix of boys and girls so we're thinking of inviting all of the girls.

I managed to get a list of their names. And our local soft play (currently) has availability

How would you feel about getting an invite to a strangers party? Would you be wary? I would actually love it as I'd like an ice breaker opportunity.

Am I overthinking or should we just go for it??

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Smartiepants79 · 12/09/2024 18:51

It’s not a strangers party , it’s the party of one of their classmates.
You're never really going to know many of the kids in the class or their parents. Just a few as the year goes on.
My kids would have been made up and as long as we were free we’d have been there with bells on.

KerryBlues · 12/09/2024 18:53

Her classmates aren’t strangers, op.
Go for it.

mynameiscalypso · 12/09/2024 18:54

We had a whole class party in the second week of Reception - it worked really well.

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ThisOchreLemur · 12/09/2024 18:55

I would attend with my reception DD if I would receive an invitation from a classmate of her.
I think it's an opportunity for your daughter to bond with her new friends and for you to meet their parents too.

Timeforaglassofwine · 12/09/2024 18:55

Go for it. The KS1 party circuit is the best way to meet other parents.

Rory17384949 · 12/09/2024 19:04

Great way to get to know people, I wouldn't think it was weird at all

DancingPhantomsOnTheTerrace · 12/09/2024 19:07

I wouldn't think it was weird to get that invitation at all.

InTheRainOnATrain · 12/09/2024 19:07

Do it! It’s a great opportunity to get to know everyone. And if it’s affordable for you invite then I would invite the boys too because it’s very young to be dividing along gender lines and they usually play with a mix at that age!

Goldbar · 12/09/2024 19:09

This is not unusual in any way though for the parties we had at beginning reception, the whole class was invited not just the girls. That said, I wouldn't think anything of it if it was just the girls because practically speaking there are limited venues for 30+ kids and the expense for parents is huge. I would be clear on whether you can or cannot accommodate siblings though!

JumalanTerve · 13/09/2024 03:10

I don't think it's weird to invite classmates to a party this early in the term, but I do find it quite depressing that children are already being divided along gender lines at 4 or 5 years of age. I get it's hard financially to invite everyone, but for example my son's just started reception and his playmates at nursery school/other friends were more or less gender balanced, he would be quite upset to not be invited somewhere just because he's a boy

Original poster
onthemovepasturesnew · 13/09/2024 06:19

What would you do in this scenario then? Given that we cannot afford to invite all of the children in the class. Put all 30 names in a hat and randomly select 15?

OP posts:
OtterOnAPlane · 13/09/2024 06:31

onthemovepasturesnew · 13/09/2024 06:19

What would you do in this scenario then? Given that we cannot afford to invite all of the children in the class. Put all 30 names in a hat and randomly select 15?

I'd probably ditch the soft play idea and find a party I can afford for all of them. It's a great bonding thing and you'll inevitably find that some kid you miss out is your DD's best friend next week.

4/5 year olds are easy to please. With a community hall, some cold pizza and a bubble machine you're half way there.

stopringingme · 13/09/2024 06:36

@onthemovepasturesnew

How about a village hall or similar and a bouncy castle - check the hall size to make sure it fits.

Then some party games.

You can then do some food and cake.

It would probably be much cheaper than soft play and you would be able to invite the whole class.

TheLurpackYears · 13/09/2024 06:38

Please don't invite only the girls, you will be limiting your daughter's social life and possibly your own too- there mught be some great parents of boys in the group. The commuity centre idea above would work if you have 2 or 3 other people to help and keep it short, some kids will be completely frazzled at the start of reception so 90 minutes to 2 hours maximum, the same as it would be at soft play

TeenToTwenties · 13/09/2024 06:43

I think inviting all the girls is fine if you need or wish to limit numbers. We never did whole class parties, DD wouldn't have coped.
(We didn't even do all the girls as her class was very girl heavy.)

mamaaa2bee · 13/09/2024 11:07

I’m having the same dilemma, first child and birthday is first week November. DH says invite all the girls, will also invite some girls from her nursery. But im undecided whether to invite just the girls or the whole class. Its tough being the first to do a party and not knowing which way to go.

Back when I was in school I don’t remember any girls being invited to boys parties and vice versa but that may have been the culture of the area. But in this day and age theres the fear of offending people by just inviting just the girls or just the boys. And theres also people saying don’t invite just one gender as it will affect your child’s social life.

My DD did enjoy playing with both girls and boys in nursery and often says boys play too rough. Im thinking of community hall with a princess themed entertainer. Would boys want to come along to a princess party? Most entertainers have a max of 25 children. If the whole class plus some from nursery turn up it will be around 38. Also party is in the half term, usually families are on holidays and have other plans so would anyone even turn up. Just so confused as have already promised DD a party as she had been to a few in nursery and wants her own.

MumonabikeE5 · 13/09/2024 11:10

Reception and year one are prime for all class parties! It is the way to get to know the other parents in a pretty low key way.

have the party,
enjoy!

Loooooo · 13/09/2024 11:10

My daughter’s birthday is end of September and we did this when she started school. We invited the whole class (boys and girls) and it was a bouncy castle in a village hall type party. It was great for people to get to know each other

mindutopia · 13/09/2024 13:46

It’s the norm to invite the whole class in reception and no one will know anyone to start. It’s how you get to know each other. I’d be inclined to find a cheaper alternative and invite everyone. Or find extra money and do soft play with the hope some won’t be able to attend anyway.

InTheRainOnATrain · 13/09/2024 13:55

onthemovepasturesnew · 13/09/2024 06:19

What would you do in this scenario then? Given that we cannot afford to invite all of the children in the class. Put all 30 names in a hat and randomly select 15?

Bouncy castle in a village hall might be cheaper than soft play and you won’t have to limit the numbers?

mynameiscalypso · 13/09/2024 15:36

There's also the issue of invites - our school won't give out party invites unless the whole class is invited

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