4 year old wont do swimming lessons by herself

[Mummymoo23]

Hi all. Me and my daughter have been doing adult and child swimming lessons and she’s doing fantastic. She’s now ready to move to the next stage which means I’m not in the pool which makes her freak out. When we’ve tried to get her to go in by herself she just burst in to tears and wouldn’t let go of me. It’s not that she’s scared of the water as she loves it but she’s incredibly shy. I’m not sure what to do now the group we are in the teacher says there no point her staying in that group as she’s competent and won’t learn anything else. Any advice? My mum suggested me or her dad taking her once a week and try teaching her without armbands but im unsure.

What will she be learning in the next group? Is it essential or can she already swim?

Wait a year?

We had to go to 1-to-1 lessons with our DD. They cost about £2 more than the group lessons we tried. The instructor gets in the pool with the kid.

See if any of your local pools do them.

And we waited just over a year before doing that.

She’d be learning without armbands basically.

We also used a lovely instructor and did some one to one sessions. She was a friendly warm personality and DD was happy to have sessions with her

We've done 1-1 for this exact reason.

I agree with wait a year. They often learn much more quickly too when they're a bit older.

I think waiting a year is a good idea. Never though of 1 to 1 lessons!

I had this problem with my DD at the same age, she absolutely wouldn't have a lesson without me so I found her a private teacher at my local Nuffield gym who said I could come in the pool if need be. After one lesson she was happy with the one to one attention from the teacher and I was no longer required thank god. Cost me a fortune but her confidence soared and I was able to switch her to group lessons after a few months.

Thanks all. Solved my problem in minutes 😂

Very young still. Ds1 had one lesson on his own at 5. Hated it and said he wasn't going back for 100 years. Tried again 6 months later and he was fine. Just needed that bit of extra maturing.

She might have the physical skill to move up a level, but maturity/emotionally, she isn't ready. And that's fine. She's 4.

You can either give 1:1 lessons a try, or give it up and try again in another 6 months or so. It's no problem. Plus she's much more likely to pick up the skills quickly and competently at 6 or 7 than she is at 4.

Qualified swimming teacher here! This behaviour is super common, not just with young kids but children of all ages. When you transfer from the "mother and child" class your child has become really dependent on you being with them, you're there safe place in the water. There's a couple of things you could try, once she's been taken for her class say a swift goodbye and then sit somewhere out of sight (being able to see the parent can sometimes stress the child out more, but sit so you can still see them). Or if it's really bad then it's a case of staying close by the side of the pool and basically it's down to the teacher to progressively encourage the child into the water, I've had cases where it's literally taken MONTHS until the child was comfortable in the water without the parent. Be consistent, supportive, go at the childs speed otherwise you're gonna make the problem 10 times worse and she'll never get in alone!

Also please ignore your mother, I'm sorry but that's dreadful advice and pretty dangerous. You want your daughter to understand that flotation devices are there to assist her and be her new safe space, you never want to encourage a child to swim without a swimming aid!! In a registered venue it's actually against the law to let non swimmers enter the water without swimming aids. Plus there's nothing worse than a child saying their parents are teaching them, then they come into lesson taking 10 steps back! Hope this helps!

Also it's been proven that the sooner a child learns to swim, the easier it is for them, they develop skills much faster at a younger age and it's incredibly life saving!!
I've taught countless 3 year olds - always easier than a 7 year old that's got little to no experience