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Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

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Original poster

Children locked away

15 replies

Parent94 · 08/09/2024 23:12

After having a conversation with my son, aged 6 suffers from epilepsy. He mentions that mummy locks him away when he's naughty. This conversation was absolutely random so I'm leaning towards it's not just a random made up event.
I've heard from other people in the place we live that DM is abusing substances.
How on earth do I approach this?

OP posts:

CaptainCabinetsTrappedInCabinets · 08/09/2024 23:14

You do not let him go home.

MiddleSock · 08/09/2024 23:15

Social services for their advice and interaction. Tonight if he’s with you and due with her tomorrow.

Aquamarine1029 · 08/09/2024 23:17

You don't allow him to go back to his mother until SS has investigated. I would also file a report with the police.

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Original poster

Parent94 · 08/09/2024 23:26

Tried all of that. None will take notice. I get the " not in their remit". I hate sending my children back. But I have zero evidence. Only the word of a 6 year old!

OP posts:

JanglyBeads · 08/09/2024 23:31

Report to school then, safeguarding issues. This is definitely in ss's remit.

sprigatito · 08/09/2024 23:34

Of course it's in their remit. It is their remit! I think you should keep calling them and insisting that they take this seriously. Talk to the school as well. I might call the police as well, it can't hurt.

Original poster

Parent94 · 08/09/2024 23:39

sprigatito · 08/09/2024 23:34

Leaving autistic children in a car for 2 hours + on a daily basis alone isn't in their remit ( with cctv proof) . My faith in the authorities is absolutely zero.

OP posts:

Noseybookworm · 09/09/2024 00:06

How old are your other children? I would definitely speak to the school and raise your concerns. Report to Social Services too, even if you have no faith in them, you need them to have a record of what/when you've reported concerns to them. Do you share parental responsibility with your children's mother? Can you get an emergency court hearing if you have serious concerns about the children's welfare?

Treetertop · 09/09/2024 00:08

Tell school, tell the police.

Doingmybest12 · 09/09/2024 00:47

Keep the children with you, and let her seek legal advice if she wishes to force contact or having them returned. That is if you believe they are at risk and its in their best interests of course. Parents have a duty to protect their children, its not only the states responsibility.

PlantDoctor · 09/09/2024 01:31

You are being unreasonable. Protect your child. Keep them with you. Report her to social services and the police. You can't just say they won't listen. Their staff unfortunately can make mistakes at times I'm sure, but this is a pattern that cannot be ignored.

Singleandproud · 09/09/2024 01:37

What legal paperwork is there in place that means you have to return them if you think they are at risk of harm?

If you have genuine concerns then I would contact school, SS, and possibly GP for your disabled child to get it on record. Then if you have a child arrangements order or similar apply to the court to amend it tomorrow.
You often hear courts requesting substance testing but I don't know if that is just on TV or in America etc.

RawBloomers · 09/09/2024 01:57

What jurisdiction are you in, OP?

Is contact court ordered or an informal agreement? Can you just keep him if you think she’s endangering him?

(Also, you mention autism and epilepsy - does your DS have both or was one a typo? This isn’t necessarily relevant to keeping your DS safe, but does make him DS more vulnerable).

YourBlueCrab · 09/09/2024 02:01

Those saying to keep your child are wrong. You can't legally stop your child going back to their mother.
Are you in Britain? If yes you report this to Social Services. If they are saying not in their remit, them I suspect you are not telling us the full picture i.e. locks him away might mean tells him to go to his room when he is naughty. Some on MN would not agree with this method of parenting, but its not a safeguarding issue therefore not in Social Services remit.

Doingmybest12 · 09/09/2024 06:28

If both parents have PR and there is no legal order then the other parent can keep the child if they are worried for their safety. If there is an order they should seek urgent legal advice and keep them if they have safeguarding worries , if they haven't got immediate worries then they should seek legal advice and seek to have their child with them.

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