Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Should I be concerned about my nearly 3 year old

3 replies

Camzarella · 08/09/2024 16:50

Hello,

I've hesitated writing on here about this for ages due to fear of judgement but also because I'm not sure if I'm just being paranoid, but here it goes.

My DS will be 3 in October and I have some concerns that I'm hoping are just delays and that he'll grow out of. The main flags are:

  • He has limited conversational speech. He can say a lot of words, recognises people, animals, objects, characters by name and actually can count to 20, read the alphabet and knows several shapes but his conversational skills are limited. He can ask for things in a basic pattern, such as 'I want breakfast please' or if you ask him what he wants to eat he can answer but he can't yet respond yes or no to general questions. Sometimes he just repeats what you've said without answering. He often recites songs or sayings from his favourite shows
  • He's a very picky eater. When weaning and up to about age 2 he would eat and try a variety of foods including fruits. Now he more or less eats the same food every day. He's seeming to even go off some of the foods in the limited diet he eats. I spoke with a Pediatrician who said I shouldn't be too worried as he has cereal with milk, plenty of water and protein but I'm naturally still concerned
  • He has very challenging behaviour at times. He can have extreme tantrums if he doesn't get his own way or when he's frustrated. These can be soul destroying at times. The nursery have said he never tantrums there and follows instructions. He does sometimes disengage from activities in the class but apparently he's not the only one. His key worker isn't concerned at all about his behaviour. But at home is super tough. We've just bought a new baby home and it's becoming so challenging. He has tantrums every day. My suspicion is that he lack of communication makes it worse
  • He isn't very expressive, but I wouldn't have noticed this if I didn't have a very expressive great nephew a few weeks older than DS. He laughs and smiles a lot and can pull silly faces but generally has mostly the same expression.
  • He sometimes handlaps if he's upset or excited but not often enough for others aside from me to notice.
  • He is very high energy, particularly when outdoors and prefers to play alone. However he does acknowledge other children and try to hug and kiss them and does play together sometimes, particularly with younger babies.

Does he sound like an average toddler? He saw a Pediatrician a few months back and they concluded that he has some signs which COULD mean ASD but are also toddler related behaviours so too young to diagnose.

Anyone else been through similar or same? Any tips? I feel so very down (8 days pp from an emergency c section after a difficult pregnancy so baby blues not helping!)

OP posts:
Normandie · 08/09/2024 16:57

Much of that could have been my DC at 3, now at 6 only just coming out of the picky eating bit but still prefers to play solo, struggles with emotional regulation. He is neurotypical.

Dr Becky talks about Deeply Feeling Kids, her tactics might be helpful. Try not to worry, see how things change over the next year or two. Whether has has/doesn’t have ASD will become clearer.

johnd2 · 09/09/2024 07:10

I would say keep an eye, use techniques advocated to help ASD children, and mention your concerns to school when he starts (as often as you can get away with)
He could well be masking at nursery and letting it out at home, we had that from 9 months old, glowing reports from the child minder but meltdown at the door at pickup.
The good thing about school is they have qualified teachers and the backup of the SEN team, whereas private nurseries don't necessarily have that expertise available so it's got to be obvious to pick up there.
Good luck, even if he is autistic it's going to be hard but it's not a disaster by any means.

Dippydinosaurus · 09/09/2024 07:19

Have you had a referral to speech and language? The anger could be as he's unable to communicate. What has your nursery SENCO said? If you don't go to nursery your health visitor will be able to help

New posts on this thread. Refresh page