what are your views on health visitors

[honeydew]

I have a pretty poor view of health visitors and wondering what others think. The two I've had have both been absolutely useless! They never followed up after the initial visits to my home directly after the birth of each of my children. They don't seem ever be easily available or provide any good advice that you couldn't get from family, friends, a doctor, health/parenting book or the internet. My health visitor last week phoned my husband's mobile twice and left a message she was "desperate" to contact me so that I could arrange for my baby to have her 12 month check. This was the first time I'd heard from her in a year! As an experienced mother, I just have the impression now that health visitors are there simply to check up on you! Does anyone else feel the same way or have you had more positive experiences?

So disappointed with mine, i dont normally see her as i have baby #6 and dont really do the baby clinic thing anymore.

She phoned up to make an appointment to come and see me as the Consultant Paed had referred me as dd has just been diagnosed with Turners Syndrome. I pointed out to her on the phone that all the children would be present, she said good so i assumed she wanted to see them all.

She arrived and came to sit in the front room, all the children were there including some friends children who were staying. She proceeded to talk all about dd's diagnosis in detail. I pointed out the children knew nothing. She carried on even mentioning the fertility issues, need for growth hormones and finally saying Turners Syndrome out loud. I immediately took her downstairs and said again the children DO NOT KNOW, especially dd!! (she is 7)

I was furious, the children were luckily zoned out and seem to have heard nothing. I am so cross. This was a week ago and i am writing a letter of complaint.

How bloody stupid can one person be?

I have had some lovely HV in the past to be fair. Clearly she is not one of them

My HV is part of a team covering a big area of the town where I live, and they have all been fantastic (have seen several different ones at various drop in clinics).
They have helped with my bf-ing, made sure the GP gave me fluconazole for deep nipple/breast thrush, always been interested in my DS's development, and even said 'do BLW - that's fine' when I asked them about finger foods - I didn't even mention the term!
I'm sorry for others who've had bad experiences - my HV is loads better than my community midwife was

All the hv's at our clinic have been lovely, very supportive and knowledgeable with bf, especially when dd1 was gaining weight really slowly. they set up a bf support group too.

I like my health visitors. They've always been helpful when I've approached them.

benandgerry this could well explain why my once lovely hv seems to really be losing it recently. Whereas once she seemed to be very involved, now she seems to be going through the motions.
Bloody government wankers

I had the same HV for both children and have to say she was great, very supportive and relaxed, offered good advice and was great when my partner started working away.

I had a great hv with both of my ds's. DS1 I didn't really need her too much, although I was a single parent and her support and knowing I could call her was invaluable. With DS2 he was very ill for the first year of his life and we had a terrible time getting ourselves 'heard' by the medics. She would always follow up our concerns and agreed that something was amiss with him.
She did do the immensly unpopular thing of pointing out he was underweight, and I can remember responding quite badly to it but she was right, he was very skinny.
I do think that if you have a healthy baby and you are all doing okay then of course the need is reduced but in my view a good hv is worth their weight in gold!

BTW she was right, and so were we four years on our DS was diagnosed with a chromosome disorder.

My HV was fab.

Amongst other things she used to run a bfding support group.

She really helped me with a few problems.

She was up to date on stuff, but used common sense along with guidelines.

Wasn't too bothered with height/weight unless there was a problem.

She actually used to work with my mum years ago, I think she was involved in child protection or something similar.

Fabulous.

Couldn't have done it without her.

I also have a very good HV. Especially with BF. DD didn't put on any weight for 2 weeks, and she didm't once mention top-ups or formula. Just referred us to the local BF co-ordinator, who sorted out all of our problems. Like others have said - it's surely not that difficult to refer mothers to the right people.

I also liked her approach to the growth charts. I often went to the baby clinic with another mum whose baby was born on the same day. After her rocky start, my DD was putting on huge amounts of weight each week (on 75th centile), whereas the other little baby would put on an oz or two, if that. We would both get a big 'well done' from the HV as she had the sense to see that both babies were following their own growth pattern quite happily.

I haven't really had to see her about anything else, just the usual developmental checks, and she is always easy going and friendly, as well as knowledgable.

However... my friend's HV basically messed up my friend BF because she didn't seem to understand that not all babies have to be on the 50th centile...

potatofactory i am a teacher and i take your point.

BUT pay/conditions/red tape do not prevent a HV from admitting they do not have the training or experience to advise on (eg) bf-ing problems and pointing me in the direction of someone who does. Mine ordered me to give dd formula, literally saying, "when is her next feed?" "about 1pm" I answered. "well it's 12 now you have time to go to the supermarket". I was in floods of tears saying "but i really want to bf, can I at least think about this overnight?" - she said no!!! We were out of the door and in the supermarket before i came to my senses, called the BFN and thanks to their ongoing support (& MN!) am still feeding DD at almost 5mths. I KNOW that she couldn't have given me that advice, but she could have admitted that and referred me to them.

Poor analogy, but as a teacher if i came across a child who I didn't feel equipped to deal with, I would be asking for support from the relevant agencies, asking for suitable training etc. i wouldn't tell their parents a load of crap because i couldn't admit i didn't know enough on the subject.

i want to be very clear that MY hv was crap, that doesn't mean i think they all are.

am at benandgerry's caseload OMG

i'm sorry for you benandjerry, but i do agree with VS that it seems to be ego that won't allow many HVs to just say 'gawd, please phone the NCT, they'll help you more than i am trained for'. especially if things are goiing the way they're going, then that ego has to go in order not to fail new mums.

it's not right, of course, that SS are relying on you so much but if it is the new order then these old schoolmarms have to get with the programme. i've previously said that my HVs kinda evaluate who needs help in those first few weeks then leave the people alone who seem to be coping. actually i think that is a good system. i could just have done with more practical bfing help in those first few crucial weeks, and the sort of help i needed was to be referred to a specialist medical unit but my HV wasn't sufficiently qualified to spot the signs. having said that, at least she wasn't an utter bitch, like some of the visiting midwives i had.

and ggg, it's a subject people want to talk about and there has been a good spread of opinion. didn't you used to be an HV, couldn't you have contributed something other than a parp?

My health visitor was a complete legend in her time, she helped us through my sons illness at three weeks, his subsequent diagnosis as profoundly deaf and also did his portage with him, when my husband died when my son was five she came to my dh's funeral and even though she has retired to Scotland we still keep in touch now!! Its a shame there arent more like her now!!

Caz10 - actually, I thought that was a good analogy! People offering rubbish advice they are not equipped to give, especially when relating to babies' health (say,) is obviously bad. There is no excuse for that.

The giving of poor advice is one complaint that people have - there have also been comments such as 'she only came round when there were forms to fill in', however, which may well be to do with conditions (i.ee workload / the prioritising of child protection, or whatever.)

By the way, I've got to say, my HV is no great shakes!

What a depressing thread, overall. Apart from all the stories of lovely HVs, or course.

I think some HVs are reluctant to let go of the old way of working, they try to carry on and be all things to everyone, do unpaid overtime to try to fit it all in and end up going off sick with stress.
We can't be an expert in everything, and I try to explain this at the new birth visit and make sure parents know who they can contact for what and have details of helplines and support groups (and mumsnet )

for a teacher, I don't half make a lot of typos! What shocking standards; education is going to the dogs in this country, etc, etc...

StarlightMcKenzie - best to stay away from weighing scales if babies are healthy and feeding and weeing. I've got a "rubbish BF advice" story to cap yours...
a mother of a 3 month old BF baby told me she'd been to the hospital for routine SCBU follow up which unfortunately included weighing (baby now perfectly healthy and breast feeding beautifully)and the the consultant paed told her the baby was overweight and she should give less breast feeds. Fortunately she thought she'd check before she cut down on the feeds and I managed to convince her to ignore the paeds advice. He obviously had no clue about the depths of his ignorance, I contacted the hospital BF co-ordinator who said she wasn't surprised, but couldn't force the Drs to attend the breast feeding training sessions.

Feel I have to say that my (now retired HV) was fantastic and got me through a very difficult time when DS was little. I was a first time (and fairly clueless though not 'dim') mum with a collicky baby, abusive partner and medical problems that flared up post-partumn. She was experienced enough to see straight through my "I'm coping fine act" and to keep showing up until things really were better. This was despite the fact she was responsible for at least two caseloads in a very demanding catchment area.

I don't know what I would have done without her and was to learn that she was (in part) being replaced by Nursery Nurses (no offence intended to any nursery nurses reading!).

hee potatofactory, i do almost all my posting while feeding dd, typing and spelling are awful, i hate saying i'm a teacher for that very reason!

it is quite depressing isn't it?

My HV is quite young, so it's not like she is stuck in old ways or anything.

My health visitor has been amazing, always boosting my self esteem re breastfeeding and parenting in general, and I've always felt that she really cares and has a lot of expertise. She realised that ds was seriously ill when he was 3 weeks old and not gaining weight, and it turned out he had septicaemia; if she hadn't been so switched on he could well have died.
I really value her opinion, and I guess I have taken it for granted that HVs are knowledgeable and supportive, which is my experience. I find it quite shocking and sad that there are so many negative perceptions out there, and that so many people have had bad experiences, as I think that when HVs are good they have a very important role to play. It can be hard to have any perspective on your own situation and whether the issue is BF, PND, illness or whatever I think a good HV is invaluable.

I have recently moved but my old HV was totally useless. Ds was off the chart pretty much from birth and she told me to cut down the amount I was feeding him as he was overweight. I pointed out that a) I was bf him and b) he was also off the chart for his length and her response was to suggest that I switched to formula so I could measure how much milk he was taking, wtf!

Also when I was having some problems with bf in the early weeks I asked her if there was any local groups and she said none, even though there was a BFN support group that met on the same day as the health clinic in the same health centre!

I really, really disliked her, as did most f my friends. I went to see my new HV yesterday for ds 2 year assessment and I was impressed at all with the new hv, didn't seem to have a clue, but maybe that is being harsh as it was the first time I had met her

Mixed feelings about mine - was very helpful on visit prior to birth, then was on holiday when dd was due 15 day check. Had a stand-in instead, who was lovely & explained lots about feeding patterns etc., re-assured us that no response on left ear hearing test was nothing to worry about at that stage and stayed and chatted for ages.

Next visit from usual HV - i opened door in tears from exhaustion and desperation from trying to get dd to sleep for longer than 20 mins - her reaction - [patronising voice] "ooh, have we got a touch of the baby blues then?"!. Drew me a graph of babies sleeping patterns and left again. Can't remember much about next visit (probably still knackered!)

last visit at 6 months was much better - reassured me about dd's weight (baby clinic staff thought she wasn't gaining enough) and didn't bat an eyelid when i said we were doing blw.

She was my mum's HV when db was born 20 years ago so she's got lots of experience and must have had to deal with a lot of changes in the guidelines in that time - just sometimes feel that she wants to get visit over & done with asap.

I am all for HV in principle, but mine was useless - visited once, told me all the different ways I could kill my baby ("You mustn't use a sling! I know a baby who suffocated between his mother's breasts"), whenever I asked her for advice she'd say, "I don't know, I've never had a baby". She said if dd got a cold I must take her to A&E IMMEDIATELY because babies can't breathe through their mouths and so die if they get blocked up.

She then disappeared when my almost-bankrupt PCT axed most of the area's HV service. Two and a half years on, dd has never had a developmental check or an immunisation reminder. I'm not remotely surprised that we have about the lowest immunisation rates in the country.

Like FAQ, both my HV down in England and my one here are brilliant. They both have the everyone is different attitude and don't make a big thing about the developmental 'goals' as well. When I visit my mum, I usuall nip over to my old baby clinic to see if my old HV is around.

Tom just had a 2 year chat, well HV and I chatted about his lack of talking. She said as long as he is understanding what we are saying to him, in the toddler kinda way, then there is nothing to worry about at the moment. "Tom needs his shoes" - he got mine! "bed" - he tapped his head.

If he was talking, "fetch mummys keys" might have worked wednesday morning when he locked me out!

One of my cousins hated her HVs.