Feeling like the worst mum in the world rn

[CoolSnake]

New here, so apologies if I don't know all the acronyms and unwritten rules!

So, I'm a mother to a 3, nearly 4 year old (she's 4 next month). I've been a SAHM all her life but started working part-time in June. Job is great, hours are perfect, DD has adjusted well to me not being around so much. All is well.

We live in Spain and kids start school at 3yo here. She loves school and has really missed it over the summer. I had to put her in "summer school" for the past two months and she seemed to get on fine, just didn't like it as much as "proper school". She is neurodivergent like me and she had some struggles but overall it was OK.

She picked up nits 3 times. 3 times in 2 months. And now she has them AGAIN after sharing a graduation cap. We will be treating her tonight before her bath.

Why do I feel like the worst mum in the world? The nits and the awful heat rash she has. I've been treating it with aloe Vera but it's spread all over her body. She doesn't seem to be in discomfort and doesn't complain about it but it looks terrible. She gets it every year in summer but this year it's worse. I went to the pharmacy and he told me to use a cream for atopic skin but I've used it before and it's not much good. I think I'm just going to nit treatment her, bath her and slather her in Sudocrem and hope for the best. And if that doesn't work I will take her to the doctors.

My DH thinks I'm overreacting and everything is fine but I just look at my poor little girl and wonder how I could have let it get this bad. She's happy, she's in good spirits. She loves me. But I just feel like I've let her down :(

Maybe it's me who hasn't adjusted to going back to work. I just feel like I have neglected her and this is all my own doing. I haven't been paying enough attention? Am I just being paranoid?

Help!

She's happy in herself, likes her school, & you're being responsible about the headlice! Nothing to feel guilty about.

Can you tie her hair back / down / cut it short? The feckers crawl from head to head, so containing hair can reduce catching them, otherwise it's just vigilance, comb comb comb.

Put her hair up. I've heard using hair spray can deter them. A colleague of mine uses tea tree spray in her dds hair as a prevention.

She is, she's such a happy little girl. It just riles me up she got through a whole school year with no lice and now 4 times in 2 months!

Her hair is already quite short (just below her ears). It's a shame as all her friends have long hair and she wants long hair but it's like mine - blonde and super fine. Thankfully I managed to get her to the hairdresser for a cut while she was nit-free 😂

Thank you. I am a worrier!

Sudocreme isn't good for heat rash. It's too thick and blocks the pores IME. Have you given her antihistamine?

Sadly her hair is a) too short to tie up and b) her sensory issues prevent me from putting it in pigtails. Like if I even mention it she has a meltdown. She hates it. I have three different lotions and a special repellant shampoo with tea tree. I'm just gonna soldier on with it and pray she's clear for back to school next week! 🤗

Some Eastern Uropean methods I still found useful when my DC had this problem:

Rinse her hair with water + vinegar. (Make sure none gets into her eyes, maybe get her to put swim goggles on). Then brush her wet hair with fine comb. Vinegar dissolves the glue lice use to attach nits to the hair. You will be able to comb out most of the lice this way, too. Rinse the comb between strokes or brush on some cotton to stay at the base of the teeth to collect the nasty stuff.

Alternatively, use a lot of hair conditioner on wet hair and comb it really well.

Lotions etc are good but mechanical removal of nits and lice is much more effective and not as toxic for your DC, especially if she has sensitive skin. if the above methods are too much, you can just brush her hair with nit comb as often as you can over a towel, and go through her hair to remove any nits.

For irritated skin, bathe her/ wash her skin in camomolile water (basically, camomile tea). It's really good for reducing inflammation.

You are not a bad mum. Nits are a nightmare but it's a fact of life if you have kids! Just make sure you treat them methodically, including washing her bed linen and any toys on her bed.