9&5 year old getting bus

[GreatMauveShaker]

Hi

My ex partner has become really difficult recently. He is expecting our children on his nights after school to get a public bus by themselves for 40 minutes to his work. They would have to leave school alone, wait for the bus on a main road and then spend 40 minutes on a bus with out a mobile etc. Is this suitable, I have said it isn't and I will provide an alternative arrangement till he finishes work. But he is kicking of saying it's his night so he will sort the kids, but I do not think this is a safe arrangement. What are your thoughts?

Thanks

No school in England would let a 5 year old leave with a 9 year old, but I would get in first and pre warn school and make it clear your not in agreement

This absolutely^

P.S. And I would leave out my comment that he is a cunt of the highest degree as it’s obvious.

And yes, go to school first and have a conversation. He might lie them that you are in agreement.

Why are you only half thinking of calling the school? I’d be straight on the phone with a call first thing. In fact I’d probably be drafting an email now.

Agree with this

Thanks all, I will contact the school tomorrow

@GreatMauveShaker heavens!! it was obviously not his turn to have the brain cell when he made that decision about the kids!!! hope the school says no!!

I wasn't sure if there was any point, or if the school will just flat out say no. I was not going to allow it to happen, but just wanted others opinions first to make sure I wasn't over reacting

They are far too young to do this. Try and get in first with a call to the school tomorrow to make sure they will block your ex from doing this.

Absolutely call the school (before he does) and check that they won’t allow it

I could maybe see this for a sensible 9 year old with a phone but def not with a sibling in tow. And our school wouldn’t allow it - that said once the older one is y6 I’m not sure what they could actually do about it

Going through court is pretty awful but I would definitely recommend speaking to a solicitor about getting a CAO to formalise things, or just to send him a letter saying you are considering it. You can raise these kinds of issues in court to illustrate his thinking isn't child centred and is based on what's best for him.

If you can't afford a solicitor, you can self represent. I have done this and it was stressful but manageable and it means it's not just you refusing but the court telling him no.

If you think he's going to continue to be difficult to coparent with, you have many years to go and court might alleviate some of the issues.

Tell the school. They will put steps in place to make sure it doesn't happen

I think they could refuse to release a 5yo to a Y6 child alone

Hell no. I would speak to the school, explain your situation, ask for it to be flagged by them (prob would be anyway) as a safeguarding situation, and if all else failed I'd report the school to the police for letting the 5 yo go with their sibling. Not that I think for a second the school will allow it. Sounds to me like their twat of a father is trying to take risks to upset you.

Yes you’re right. I am not sure if both kids were in ks2 though.

9 is young to get bus alone. Social Services will interested in a 5 year old doing it without an adult.

School will not allow a 5 year old to leave school in the care of a 9 year old sibling to catch a public bus for a 50 minute ride. I’d also be very surprised if the bus allowed it either without callin the police.
That will be a big fat no!

What difference does being in year 6 make? They’re still schools responsibility. And they’d never allow them to take the 5 year old.

No no no you can't allow this to happen they are just children. It's a recipe for disaster.

Obviously that is definitely not safe? Not only is it dangerous but it is not fair to burden your nine year old with the responsibility of keeping their fiver year old sibling safe.
You absolutely need to contact the school urgently and tell them that you do not give permission for this to happen. I would also be tempted to contact children’s services, because I would be concerned about what other dangers your ex is putting the children in. If he thinks this is ok, does he leave them alone at home?

Our school allows year 6s to go home alone and take siblings. That said I’d hope that in this particular case they’d refuse to let the younger child go.

If it's his night it's up to him to sort it with school. As people have pointed out its unlikely they will let the 9 year old rake the 5 year old without an adult present. You've told him.ypyr concerns, the balls in his court

We do have children travelling across the city and changing buses at 9.

But it depends on the child, the area, the timing, the risks. a mobile would be essential. How do the children feel about it? Have they completed the journey with any adult? How would they cope with a missed bus, break down, someone offering a lift etc? What one 9-year-old does is not the same as another. Some are more streetwise and some are vulnerable.

Of course it’s not suitable. He’s a dick

No.