what do you do about nastiness towards your 3 year old?! (from oversensitive mum)

[jolo]

I know I must sound like I'm overreacting but don't know what to do... I have got friendly with another mum over the last 6 months and she has a daughter aged 4, about six months older than my ds. This mum has mentioned before that she has been embarrassed by the way her dd treats one of her friends when she come and play and has apologised to their mums. The last few times we have seen them her dd has been really awful to my ds, sreaming that she wanted him out of her house, so we met in the park where she ignored him but the last couple of times she has refused to join in games he is part of and today told other children she would have nothing to do with them if they held his hand as part of a game.

Is this just normal stuff or should I protect him and look for other friends to meet in the park?! I appreciate it looks petty when it's written down but it was horrible to see her try to isolate him from the other children!

I don't think you're being petty at all. She sounds horrendous, though sadly I'd bet every single one of us has met kids like that. How does your son feel about it though? Unless he's really upset, it might help him if you see it through to the other side, as when he gets to school he won't have you there. If you can show him a good way through this, it might really build his confidence.
What she's doing sounds like classic attention seeking to me. If it is, then she'll soon get bored, especially if the other kids aren't following her lead. + I'd definitely say something to the mother, as her DD is bullying your son, or at the very least trying to. You don't have to be confrontational about it, but surely she should be stepping in. Why isn't she?

Does her mother not intervene at that point?

Oh thanks for that ladies, I felt I was being really silly. I know meeting people like this is part of life, but I was not sure how much to get involved in their arguaments if you know what I mean. I thought I had found a solution by meeting with a larger number of kids which is why I felt like giving up when it got worse in that context.

Her mum does try to tell her off but I think the girl picks up on her mum's embarrassment and takes the upper hand. If it was me I would seperate her or take her home but she trys to laugh it off. Oddly enough the girl treats me as though I was her friend and is shocked if I take my DS's side, the whole dynamic is a bit wierd.

I have twins actually, one of whom winds her up and goes off to find other people to play with (which I think is a great response), but the other is a bit more fragile and totally baffled by her. The trouble is so many of the children we know have parent's who work full time or babies in the family I've found fewer people to meet up with in the week.
However, the twins are each other's best mate at the moment so they're not lonely (but I like a bit of company!)

I will mention it to her mum but she seems to feel bit powerless.