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10 month old has stopped sleeping in his cot

8 replies

colourPink · 24/08/2024 20:04

I'll try and cut this short. Great newborn sleeper. 4 months-8 months AWFUL sleeper. Up every hour or so. I was too worried about the risks of co-sleeping so would constantly rock him and put him back in his own cot.

But then... he slept. In his own room and cot all night. However, the last month/ 6 weeks we've been on hold at, he's had illness after illness and we've moved house. We've been in our new house coming on three weeks and I can't get him to settle in his own room.

Plus... with him being so poorly (we ended up back and forth in a&e a few times) I let him sleep with me in my bed. I've only ever done it if he's been unwell and once the illness has passed he's happily gone back into his own cot. But now he won't.

He is up hourly... I am broken. Not just throughout the night but from his bedtime (around 7:44/8). My husband and I have no evening/ no time together. I don't remember the last time I could take a bath in peace (without hearing him kick off and my husband having to deal with it) or watch something on the telly.

I feel like the only mum who's finding the older he's getting the harder it is. Anyway, he's 10.5 months now and I keep giving in and letting him in my bed (usually around 3/4am) so I can have at least a couple of hours. I go back to work next week and need this sorted.

I tried for the first 10 days or so for him not to come in my bed and for him to learn he can only sleep in his cot but it didn't work. I'm desperate for some sleep (and adult time!!).

Any advice?

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colourPink · 24/08/2024 20:05

Oh and should mention we've also just dropped his 10/11pm dream feed as he's nearing on 11 months and my sister (who had him for a few days) said he never had it and slept all night.

I don't want to go backwards and reintroduce it but we did try it last night as we're at our wits end but it didn't help at all. Should I try again tonight?

OP posts:
Justsomethoughts · 24/08/2024 20:09

Hi OP- this sounds really hard.
Have you thought about ‘gentle’ sleep training? I did a sort of Ferber type thing (with shorter intervals of letting him fuss, starting with 1 minute) with one of mine - he only cried for 10 mins max and then slept.

Flittingaboutagain · 24/08/2024 20:14

At 10 months I went from snuzpod to taking the side of the full size cot bed down so co-slept but baby had their own space. You have moved house, baby has been ill and has reached the phase of development to know that being apart from you is scary and they don't want it. I'm all for safe co-sleeping. I get so much more sleep that way because my first was up every hour until 18 months then I side car'ed the cot. Learnt my lesson ready for baby 2. It goes by in the blink of an eye. If you have a good sleeper who is happy alone fair enough, but if you don't, meet their needs by keeping them close.

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colourPink · 24/08/2024 20:23

@Flittingaboutagain our master bedroom is very small and wouldn't fit his cot in or I'd definitely do that 😞 he likes to just know I'm in the room a lot so I think that would help!

So co-sleeping for us would be in the bed. But he sleeps horizontally, kicks all night and is a bit of a pain to sleep with 😂

OP posts:
colourPink · 24/08/2024 20:26

@Justsomethoughts I have tried some gentle sleep training but could probably give it another go. He doesn't do well with being left to cry or fuss as he usually just gets himself overworked.

I always try and wait a few mins before going in (sometimes it takes me a few to even get my eyes open!) but he's such a stubborn little soul!

OP posts:
Katherina198819 · 24/08/2024 21:01

Justsomethoughts · 24/08/2024 20:09

Hi OP- this sounds really hard.
Have you thought about ‘gentle’ sleep training? I did a sort of Ferber type thing (with shorter intervals of letting him fuss, starting with 1 minute) with one of mine - he only cried for 10 mins max and then slept.

I had similar issues with my dd due to teething - took her to our bed, and after a couple weeks, she refused to sleep in hers.
Did "gentle" sleep training - went back to the room when she was crying but didn't take her out of the cot - I was holding hand, talking, etc. Every night, I increased the time I left the room- The first night, it took an hour, the second night, 30 minutes, and from the third night, she fell asleep in 5-10 min.

Jk987 · 24/08/2024 21:28

If it means you both sleep then I'd have in with you the whole night. Don't worry about anyone's opinion. It won't mean he's still there when he's 10.

Rosesanddaffs · 25/08/2024 08:31

Just have him sleeping in your bed, my daughter is 3 and still sometimes wakes during the night.

We always put her in her room but she does call out crying around 1-3am.

We are used to the kicking and head butting during sleep now 😂 it’s not great but you get used to it.

Unfortunatey adult time is limited but we just grab whatever time we can xx

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