Young girls & crop tops

[Ceebs85]

Help,

My 7yr old (just) daughter has always loved clothes and likes choosing her own outfits. Until recently it has all been rainbows, unicorns and bold prints but more and more she's wanting to lean more towards the athleisure leggings and crop tops that seem to be evvvverywhere.

Obviously I'm the parent so I decide what she has in her wardrobe however I'm just struggling to explain to her why it is inappropriate for her to be showing so much of her body. Made especially hard by the fact her cousin (who is only a few months older) does dress this way.

Any advice? I want to be careful about it and not make her body the issue, nor traumatise her 🙈

I have this fight with my 9 year old. My point was that none of her male friends go around showing their bellies, and therefore I consider it inappropriate for her to do so. I said it would be acceptable at the beach where males take their top completely off. I did get particularly snappy when she wouldn't drop it and informed her it was inappropriately sexualised and I wasn't going to allow it, but that requires background conversations.

I gave up with my second to be honest and most of the time let her where what she likes. She is clearly still a wee girl and anyone looking at her would know that.

Keep fighting this.

Nobody under the age of 12 wears styles like that where I live.

Limit your child's exposure to tiktok, youtube, and other social media.

Surely one or two, it’s not a big deal, for a 7 yr old?
As she develops into puberty maybe

My 12 year old is at this now. I let her wear what she wants and tell her she looks lovely. She has started to wear crop tops but as she is small for her age, they tend to end just before her jeans.

I struggle with this myself. She looks like a little girl no matter what she is wearing. And I think she should be able to dress how she wants while also feeling uncomfortable with the sheer skimpiness of girls clothing. Like even shorts - you can only buy short shorts for girls while there is no issue buying a baggy comfortable pair of shorts for boys.

Interesting responses which have made me think. Thank you.

I don't so much have a problem with those loose, cropped t-shirts with cycling shorts etc, my concern is more for really figure hugging lycra leggings and matching sports bra type tops because they just feel so adult and HERE IS MY BODY 😂

Hard no from me.
I think it's sexualising kids and I can't there's to many weirdos in the world.

Listen my kid would probs love to eat sweets all day but she's 7 so it's not her choice.

Interesting as what adult would actually wear Lycra and crop top outside the gym? I see those outfits as more for age 9-15 than any other age? By the time they get to 16+ I think they've moved on haven't they?!

There’s cropped T-shirts and then there’s sport bras types. The latter I just find unnecessary and not for anything expect perhaps dance hobbies at the most. I’d draw the line there

It's a no from me for my 10 year old but thankfully she wouldn't wear them anyway.

It annoys me that kids clothes shops are oversaturated with them, along with adult clothing- I would like the rest of the material with my clothes please 🤣

It's difficult because I see so many adult women out and about in crop tops and leggings. Or shorts with their bums hanging out. The feminist in me thinks they should be allowed to wear whatever the fuck they like. But the mother in me thinks we need to show our daughters when that type of clothing is appropriate.

I've handled it with my 9 year old by telling her these kind of outfits are fine for her at home, in the garden, park, gym or beach. But they're not ok for shopping centers, restaurants, cafes, library's etc. I've also told her that as she gets older she'll be able to make these choices entirely on her own.

Context of where it is being worn is everything. I think it's fine to explain that it's acceptable to dress that way at a dance class or at the gym, but in other settings one should wear a shirt.

I might wear a sports bra in the gym or at a summer track session, but I would cover up even if I was leaving the gym floor, let alone if I was going to the supermarket after.

I'm actually amazed about what has become acceptable in public now (but then I was the generation of teenagers who hide entire bodies with massive oversized black hoodies and baggy jeans even in the height of summer).

So I assume you'd be happy for her to go topless at the beach?

Why would you try and make a cheap and fatuous point like that? Girls clothing is extremely sexualised, girls start getting cat called at ten. It's hard enough trying to get a girl to be comfortable with her body whilst helping her understand boundaries and the the difference in accepted dress between the sexis without crummy contributions like that. I have no interest in debating this with you because I don't believe you're posting in good faith.

So she can't show her belly because boys don't show their bellies, but she can't show her nipples either even though boys show their nipples? I don't see how snapping at children that they can't wear clothes in case they are sexualised is boosting their self-esteem and body confidence.

My DDs wear crop tops in summer, they do not look like bras at all - they are the T shirt type or sleeveless if it's very hot. But they both dance and this kind of clothing is everywhere. I agree with PPs that there's a time and a place too - they wouldn't be allowed in a restaurant. It's for casual wear /play time etc.

My daughter is 20 and I can't honestly remember when she started wearing crop tops etc.
She started getting catcalls when she was in her school uniform, occasionally while going on a run and memorably when with her girl friends when they were wearing joggers and baggy hoodies. After that incident she said 'they do it no matter what I'm wearing!'
I think she can wear what she likes to be honest. She obviously doesn't wear crop tops, short skirts when we're in a nice restaurant etc but when out with friends it's absolutely fine.
I would say it was probably in secondary school and not 7 to be fair.

We compromised with our now 6 year old by allowing her to wear crop top vests at the weekend.