Co sleeping

[MummyMc253]

Just looking for a bit of advice please.

I am a single parent who has my daughter the majority of the time.

My daughter and I are extremely close and although her dad is fully active and we have a good co parenting relationship, he has been unwell and not able to have her overnight for some time and her and I have got into the habit of cosleeping

I have mixed feelings on this and I go back and forth. Sometims i think it is wrong and listen/ remember to what we have always been told, that we shouldn't do it as it isnt healthy but on the other hand, knowing she is a confident outgoing 3 year old who is not going to want to sleep with me forever so if it works for now, what is the problem?

I am just looking to hear people's experiences with doing this who's children are now older. Has this had negative impact or am I over thinking something very simple?

She is very reluctant to sleep on her own, however I do enforce it, but this is mainly due to me listening to others saying co sleeping is not good. I think both of us sleep better together but I don't want to cause long term issues.

Would appreciate any advice. Thanks

You’re overthinking it and at 3 they are still so little. If you don’t mind then there’s no need to make any changes. My DC would climb into bed with us almost every night at that age even though they had their own bed. At 5 they wanted a bunk bed and after a few months they stopped getting into our her. I think they were just ready at the time.

You're overthinking it, it isnt wrong. Humans aren't designed to sleep separately. As long as she has her own bed available to her and it's her choice it's fine. My DD slept in my bed until she was 10, then one night she decided that was it and hasn't been back since. She slept just fine at her dad's,grandparents and at sleepovers at friends, but at home preferred to sleep with me. She's well into her teens no, has a small double bed and a large pregnancy body pillow to 'nest' herself.

Single parent also, my DS is in my bed at 5, baby DD in her cot next to me.

Tbh, I love it!
He did have a spell in his own bed for couple of months but came back in.

I'm enjoying the cuddles.

I can give a bit of a longer range view 😂 DH and his mum were just the two of them, single mum and only child. He slept in with her every night until 8 and was still in on and off until secondary.

I can promise you he is perfectly well-adjusted, not weird and has a great (well-boundaried!) relationship with his mum.

I also have a great relationship with my parents, and mum had me in my own room at 2 months as my dad’s snoring was ruining my sleep 😂

So from my little survey of two 30-somethings… enjoy the cuddles, it doesn’t make any difference. My two are great about sleeping in their own beds but DH is away with work tonight so my eldest (4) is in our bed. I’m quite excited to get up and curl up with her in 15 mins!

If I was a single mum I'd probably sleep with my kids too.

Co-slept with DS until he was 7-8ish. I then fell pregnant and couldn't continue so he then co-slept with his dad. Continued until he was 9 and then off his own back decided he no longer wanted to, and he hasn't looked back. Is able to sleep through, in the dark, no nightlight and has no problems getting up and getting one of us if he needs to.

Currently co-sleeping with 1yo DD and wouldn't have it any other way.

Sleeping with you by their side makes them feel safe enough to be able to sleep. It also gives you peace of mind and allows you to sleep.

If it's working for you both, keep going.

Her dad will work things out his own way when he's able to have her overnight again.

She's little and needs you. Ignore anyone who tells you to stop. It won't be forever x

I'd let her. 3 is tiny. My 2 co-slept for the most part until they all of a sudden didn't anymore; they had alternative spaces to sleep and eventually migrated there.

Sleeping together is such a great way to regulate at the end of the day and ensure that you both get really great, uninterrupted sleep. It is common practice in many cultures around the world, all of which produce capable, independent adults.

I slept in my mums bed throughout whole time living at home as my dad worked away. Whenever he was back I'd just stay in my own bed and it was sent an issue.

To be honest, even when I stay at my mums now, I still sleep in her bed. We read magazines and laugh- it's great.

Zero negative effects only a very strong bond with my mum!

Wasn't an issue*