Tips for leaving baby for first time

[NimbleOchreEagle]

I am due to attend a wedding in a week and DD will be cared for by grandparents . Im very anxious to leave her and would happily not attend the wedding to stay with her.

DD is 14 weeks and I have struggled with her as until recently she was basically only happy being in my arms 24/7. I also longed for a break from her but now the opportunity is here I don’t want to be apart! She cries if anyone including dad holds her for more than a few minutes. She is ebf.

Originally we were going to attend the wedding all day and stay overnight. I am now going for the day only as I can’t leave her that long. I know she will be so upset without me and it upsets me to even think about that. I’m so anxious and worried.

Any tips on how to cope!

Then don’t go.

Will she take a bottle?

I would prob try leaving her for an hour or 2 this week with whoever it is that will be minding her. It'll give you an idea of how both of you will feel!

I wouldn’t go to the wedding. Sounds probably too soon for you and your baby (and I’m confused how it would work if baby is EBF).
Let the couple whose wedding it is know asap. Then don’t give it too much more thought.
Take care.

Have you tried her on bottles? I don't think I'd leave an ebf baby that young for more than a couple of hours unless they would take a bottle. Can the baby not go with you? Often babes in arms are accepted at weddings. I took mine along twice when under 6 months. Didn't take ear denfenders for the first but did for the second and it was much better!

Yes, or just don't go!

It's very young. I wouldn't have left mine for more than an hour or two at that stage - not because I was anxious or didn't trust other caregivers or any of the other silly reasons people will assume, but simply because an exclusively breastfed baby won't cope well without their mum for a whole day. Can you bring baby with you? Most people who aren't inviting children to their wedding will make an exception for a tiny baby. We brought DS to one at 5 months and he just fed and slept all day.

Honestly I wouldn't go either (and I've turned down wedding invites with both of mine as they were too small IMO to be left with anyone else for more than an hour or two). Does she take a bottle? Assume so if she's able to be left for that long.

At the end of the day, if you aren't comfortable with it then don't do it. Your husband can go solo, that's what mine did both times, and it worked out fine.

No children are allowed unfortunately. My partner thinks the time apart will be good for us and me not attending would cause an argument!
Sorry to correct my op - I sometimes pump and she will take bottles so it’s mainly breastfed not ebf. Grandparents are very close to venue so the plan was to nip out to see them during the day to feed her as well as leaving pumped milk with them.
I will definitely get grandparents to watch her alone this week to see how it goes. They have of course met her several times but I’m always there.

I left my baby at that age with my parents and I had my GD for one day a week from 10 weeks. You need to get used to leaving your baby and she needs to get used to being with other people. I am sure she will be fine and it will do you and your DH to have a few hours of being adults.

Definitely start leaving her for a couple of hours with dgps this week.
My dd has a 13 wk old ds, I've had him a couple of times but not for long, dd is pumping but he's on a bottle which makes things easier.
I'm actually having him tomorrow while she gets some jobs done.
He seems to know/recognise me and is happy to be left with me but I've spent quite a bit of time with him and my dd.
Personally if you're really not comfortable leaving her I wouldn't do it, you won't enjoy yourself.
I'd start off small, a meal out, a shopping trip then work up to a longer stay.
If it will cause an argument with your dp, well, that's a hill I'd die on.

Take the baby! Are you sure no children are allowed? Babies under 12 months, especially breastfed ones, are rarely included in that rule.

Afraid I agree. She will pick up your emotions and of course then won’t settle. And if you snatch her back off dad each time she cries how is she ever going to settle for him? He must feel pretty useless.

To answer your title question, I would say 'build up to it'.

But you haven't left a lot of time for that.

So, as so many others have said, if it is making you feel so anxious, then, let the couple know you just can't do it.