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Original poster

Two year old screaming for hours at night time. I’m on my knees

46 replies

sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:27

Fourth night in a row. Screaming and screaming for hours only at night. I haven’t slept properly in four nights now. I feel like I have a newborn baby except she’s two and I have work in the morning. She wants to walk around the house and then cries. I can’t cope with this. I’m worried about disrupting the neighbours. I’m filled with anxiety. It’s too hard.
my husband works long shifts so I’m alone right now. There is no break. No downtime. I have no help. Me and my husband play the who is more tired “game” and he always wins because he’s the one who does 14 hour days. But I’m full time too and I don’t have any time either but it counts for nothing. We are both shattered.

Why won’t she sleep. why is this happening? I want to scream and cry and I’m so absolutely fed up with this and feel like an utter utter failure

OP posts:
Positivenancy · 15/08/2024 23:29

Does she stop when you are in the room @sendchocolateplease?

LightFull · 15/08/2024 23:29

Could it be earache ?

Original poster
sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:29

Positivenancy · 15/08/2024 23:29

Does she stop when you are in the room @sendchocolateplease?

No. She won’t stop crying, I’m trying everything.

OP posts:

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2 year olds Families
ZeroFucksGivenToday · 15/08/2024 23:31

Deep breath. You've got this. It's so bloody hard. Does she normally sleep well and these past 4 nights are a change for her?

InWithPeaceOutWithStress · 15/08/2024 23:31

Is it a resisting sleep / being left on her own battle?

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 15/08/2024 23:32

Is she hot? It’s been really humid these past few days. My kids have been awake and after water and settling. They have a fan in their rooms now. Don’t seem to wake now.

SpiritAdder · 15/08/2024 23:33

Mine has this, it is night terrors. They need to move around. From NHS webpage

“During a night terror, you should:

  • stay calm and wait for the person to calm down
  • do not talk to them or try to stop them moving about, unless there's a risk they could hurt themselves or someone else
  • do not try to wake them – they may not recognise you and may get more upset if you try to comfort them
If they're having a night terror at the same time every night, try waking them up 15 minutes before the night terror every night for a week. This can sometimes stop the night terrors happening.”

”If your child is having night terrors or nightmares, there are things you can try to help.
Do
try having a relaxing bedtime routine
keep a sleep diary (including things you did during the day and evening, how you were feeling and how you slept) to help identify any causes
try to deal with things that might be causing stress or anxiety”

You should probably see the GP too
Do see a GP if

  • ”your child has night terrors several times a night or has them most nights
  • your child has lots of nightmares about the same thing”
acquiescence · 15/08/2024 23:34

Does she need to be checked out at the GP? Is this a regular thing or out of character? If it’s not normal, could it be an ear infection or hand foot and mouth? I had this with one child aged 2, couldn’t see any sores but his mouth was full of them and he was in agony, screamed for 3 nights in a row solidly.

Original poster
sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:34

I think she’s hot so I’ve opened the windows. This is completely new she normally sleeps well.

I’m not coping well. My husband has been working since 7am and he still hasn’t left. He was supposed to be home by now and he says he can’t leave yet. I’m worried the neighbours are going to call the police.

Im so fucking broken

OP posts:
SpiritAdder · 15/08/2024 23:34

Forgot screenshot

Two year old screaming for hours at night time. I’m on my knees
Original poster
sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:35

lll call doctor tomorrow. This isn’t normal but I can’t see what’s wrong

OP posts:
Positivenancy · 15/08/2024 23:36

does she go to sleep and wake up screaming? Or does she just start screaming when you try to get her to bed?

5475878237NC · 15/08/2024 23:36

Are you putting her to bed with you or alone?

Original poster
sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:38

She goes to bed initially then it starts after an hour of being in bed and that’s it. She won’t go in her cot, doesn’t want to go on bed. She wants to sit in living room but even then she’s still crying and screaming. The last three nights she has screamed herself into exhaustion and then goes to sleep.i had to sleep with her on couch last night. I’m so confused

OP posts:
Original poster
sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:41

SpiritAdder · 15/08/2024 23:33

Mine has this, it is night terrors. They need to move around. From NHS webpage

“During a night terror, you should:

  • stay calm and wait for the person to calm down
  • do not talk to them or try to stop them moving about, unless there's a risk they could hurt themselves or someone else
  • do not try to wake them – they may not recognise you and may get more upset if you try to comfort them
If they're having a night terror at the same time every night, try waking them up 15 minutes before the night terror every night for a week. This can sometimes stop the night terrors happening.”

”If your child is having night terrors or nightmares, there are things you can try to help.
Do
try having a relaxing bedtime routine
keep a sleep diary (including things you did during the day and evening, how you were feeling and how you slept) to help identify any causes
try to deal with things that might be causing stress or anxiety”

You should probably see the GP too
Do see a GP if

  • ”your child has night terrors several times a night or has them most nights
  • your child has lots of nightmares about the same thing”

She does have bad dreams often but she normally goes back to sleep. I didn’t think it would get to this potentially

OP posts:
5475878237NC · 15/08/2024 23:45

Having read your updates I would put her to bed in my bed for a couple of nights. Think about it like this. She knows something scary is happening in her room and she doesn't know why. Why would she want to go to bed? Of course she wants the living room. That's a safe space associated with play not fear.

I'd break the cycle by bed sharing the whole night with you in your room or her bed but I wouldn't leave her. Night terrors will likely pass soon. I'd also treat for teething before bed as molars can cause screaming at night although sounds unlikely.

RosesAndHellebores · 15/08/2024 23:46

Get her to the GP in the morning. It may very well be ears, especially if she's crying when lying down. They hurt like hell if not raised. Might putting some books under the back legs of the cot help? Can you settle her on your lap on a chair so she's upright?

You say she's hot, she will be if there's an ear infection. Have you given calpol to see if it helps? Keep her upright for half an hour before lying her down. It's summer and fairly balmy. Would a walk in the pram help if safe? Or a drive to get her off?

You aren't going to work tomorrow, yiu are going to the doctor. Relax and hold her.

I sympathise vis your husband's hours. I remember. There will be rewards in the future although that's not helpful now.

It will sound piercing to you. The neighbours are probably asleep. If they complain fuck them - there's a wall between you and them.

Slowhorses1 · 15/08/2024 23:46

Worms??

Ankling · 15/08/2024 23:46

Honestly if she has worked herself up that much I would bring her into your bed and stop trying to get her to sleep, just focus on the co regulation by sharing a story she likes or singing nursery rhymes to her. Once she has calmed herself then snuggle til she falls asleep. I know it's not a long term solution but it sounds like she needs the security and comfort. Can she talk about what is going on at all?

Original poster
sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:50

She just keeps crying mummy. She can’t seem to tell me what’s wrong. But then when I’m with her she doesn’t settle as she’s worked herself in a state. I’ve brought her into the living room as she got upset on the bed and she’s now crashed on the sofa. I don’t want to move her.
I’ll take her to doctor tomorrow if can get an appt.

OP posts:
stayathomer · 15/08/2024 23:50

My son used to start screaming at around 1 every morning. He’d be calling my or dh’s name and would be sitting up, eyes open but staring. He’d keep going for about ten/ sometimes 20 minutes while we tried to wake him. I have no advice but it did stop suddenly and never happened again. Gigantic hugs op

SpiritAdder · 15/08/2024 23:52

sendchocolateplease · 15/08/2024 23:50

She just keeps crying mummy. She can’t seem to tell me what’s wrong. But then when I’m with her she doesn’t settle as she’s worked herself in a state. I’ve brought her into the living room as she got upset on the bed and she’s now crashed on the sofa. I don’t want to move her.
I’ll take her to doctor tomorrow if can get an appt.

I think that’s best. It’s not a normal nightmare. Something is going on. Poor lass

Anonymous2224 · 15/08/2024 23:54

I used to do this as a child, I’m 34 now and my mother still talks about it every few weeks reminding me awful it was. Would wake up at the same time every single night screaming making ridiculous demands that made no sense, wanted out the back garden regularly, apparently my poor mum feeling exasperated put me out in the garden one night and I fell asleep on the grass 🫣 I had no recollection in the morning what so ever. It was night terrors.

you say she is 2 but what age exactly? How is her communication? Her understanding? Does she seem to remember any of it in the morning? If not I think it sounds like night terrors. But definitely let things like worms etc ruled out.

Franjipanl8r · 15/08/2024 23:56

We had this with DD when she was 2 or 3 ( I can’t remember now). There was absolutely no rhyme or reason or anything we could do. Possibly night terrors. Yes the neighbours got a bit annoyed but it was a phase and it passed. Just get some good ear plugs and try and console her while she screams. Hang in there!

Anonymous2224 · 15/08/2024 23:57

Anonymous2224 · 15/08/2024 23:54

I used to do this as a child, I’m 34 now and my mother still talks about it every few weeks reminding me awful it was. Would wake up at the same time every single night screaming making ridiculous demands that made no sense, wanted out the back garden regularly, apparently my poor mum feeling exasperated put me out in the garden one night and I fell asleep on the grass 🫣 I had no recollection in the morning what so ever. It was night terrors.

you say she is 2 but what age exactly? How is her communication? Her understanding? Does she seem to remember any of it in the morning? If not I think it sounds like night terrors. But definitely let things like worms etc ruled out.

I should also add that when this started for me my gran had just died and my older brother was undergoing cancer treatment so 2 year old me obviously couldn’t understand all this but was obviously stressed by the changes in my family. Has there been any big changes for your daughter recently anything that’s unsettled her?